Hakyo appears on the monitor screen from the right, smiling. HAKYO: Konnichiwa folks! Welcome to MST2K1! I'm Hakyo Ryutei… Nodin walks in from the left. NODIN: And I'm Nodin Brishen! HAKYO: Seeing as this is our first MST, we decided to callously mock one of my least favorite authors, Clayton! Or as I know him, "samonbunshi-ma"! NODIN: Start the fic! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! >I don't own any of the characters in this and am not making any money >off of them at all. HAKYO: Kami-sama be praised! > > >Outlaw Cabbit >By, Clayton Overstreet. HAKYO: Also known as "Clayton No last name". > > The large splash in the lake didn't attract much attention at first in >the >Misaki home. NODIN: I love the Misakis! They're much cooler than the Masakis! >It wasn't until they realized that Mihoshi >was still sitting on the couch that they all realized something unusual NODIN: You know something, I just realized that what I previously realized is something I never really realized before. >was going on. They all ran outside and saw a strange red spacecraft in >the lake. Some people were swimming out of the lake while the others >watched. One was a skinny but well muscled man with red hair. Next >to him was a younge NODIN: Is that like a little Nirvana kid? Like young grunge? Younge? Anybody? >boy with blond hair and a blue/black haired and >very pale girl. NODIN: The man must hate commas. >Behind them came another taller woman with HAKYO: As opposed to the first taller woman, who was taller than the third tall woman, who was shorter than the eighty-sixth tall man… >long black >hair and dressed in flowng NODIN: You know, I heard flowng water can kill a vampire. HAKYO: Think it works on horrifically bad authors? >(literaly at the moment) white robes. The NODIN: Literaly. Like fal, or bal, or maybe even rectuly! >last and most vocal was a girl that looked like she was half tiger with HAKYO: Half tiger, not a whole tiger, half tiger >white hair whining NODIN: I wish my white hair could whine. HAKYO: You'd get tired of it eventualy >and paddling poorly in the water. > When they got to shore the boy looked up at the red haired man. >"They have to have a beacon you said. What planet doesn't have a >beacon you said. Gene one of these days you're going to get us all >killed." Gene looked down at him and laughed. The young woman >that was with him HAKYO: They're all young women, its an anime, the hero doesn't hang around with spinsters! >tapped his shoulder. "Gene..." Gene turned to her >and said, "What is it Melfina?" She pointed to Tenchi's group and >Gene goggled. NODIN: Dude does he carry goggles around with him for night vision or was it just a coincidence? >"Wow..." HAKYO: Yeah that's what I would say too if I had night vision goggles. >His eyes seemed to be working their way >over Mihoshi, Ryoko, and Ayeaka NODIN: I am so glad that she changed the spelling. Ayeaka is so much easier to pronounce than the correct spelling. HAKYO: Actually its Ayeka's clone. Ayeka refused to participate in this fan-fic, on the grounds that it really sucks. >at the same time. By this time the >other two had made it out of the water and were wringing out their >clothes. NODIN: Wringing out their clothes? That suggests that they aren't wearing any. HAKYO: What? Aisha's naked? Where? >Tenchi stepped forward. "I take it you crashed." Gene smiled at him. HAKYO (as Gene): I take it you have eyes. >"Yeah. We-OW!" Jim kicked him in the leg and Gene continued, "I >thought for sure every planet had a landing beacon. I'm Gene Starwind NODIN (as Gene): Hello I have a large bounty on my head that several vicious men are trying to collect. Oh yeah, would you like to hear my life story? >and that pile of scrap in the water is my ship, the Outlaw Star." A voice >came from the ship. "I am not scrap Gene. i received very little damage >in the fall, no thanks to you." Gene looked back and yelled, "Shut up >Gilliam." Turning back to Tenchi he smiled. Tenchi bowed and looked >behind him. "Would you and your friends like to come in and dry off?" NODIN (as Tenchi): I know! I'll invite these two apparent pimps, and their young, nubile female companions to my house, to use my towels and dirty my floor. Sasami will clean it up! >He smiled a thanks NODIN: I did something along those lines once. I frowned a "fuck you". Then I blinked a "suck it". >to Tenchi and they followed him inside. > Once they were all seated and their wet clothes were hung up to dry >Tenchi suggested that they introduced themselves. HAKYO: When did that happen? I saw no introductions. In fact, it's impossible to introduce yourself to someone you haven't yet met. >Gene turned to the >people behind him. "Well he's my partner Jim Hawking. The girl behind >him is Melfina my navigator," The boy nodded and the pale girl blushed >prettily. "And those are Twilight Suzuka NODIN: She's plural now? >the best assasin in the known >universe HAKYO: Bad thing to introduce your friends as… NODIN (as Gene): Hi folks! This is my best buddy. She vivisects people for money! >and the wet ball of fur sitting behind her is Aisha Clanclan of >the Ctarl-Ctarl empire." > Washu's eyes widdend a bit as she looked at the tiger girl. "That's >not funny Gene! Do you know how long it takes fur to dry?" Washu >grinned and looked at her. "If you like I could dry you off more >quickly." Aisha looked up at her and smiled. "Realy?" NODIN: He doesn't need the extra L's, or commas. He's Clayton Overstreet, the man with no last name. HAKYO: I was wrong. This fanfic doesn't really suck. It _realy_ sucks. >Washu held out >her hands and a holographic computer appeared infront of her. >Suddenly Aisha was a ball of fluss HAKYO: Infront. The opposite of inback. And the result of inbreeding. NODIN: I love laying on my back and watching the flussy clouds go by. That one looks like a spelling error! >with her fur sticking in every >direction. Gene chuckled and Washu handed Aisha a fur brush. The >tiger girl took it with as much dignity as she could muster. > Finaly Tenchi decided to introduce himself and his friends. "I am >Tenchi misaki, NODIN: Ten times better than Tenchi _Masaki_! >first crown prince of Jurai, and this is my father >Noboyuki, and my grandfather Yosho." The other's eyes had almost >bugged out of their skulls when he said he was the crown prince. They >kept getting bigger as he continued. "These are Ayeaka and Sasami >the crown princess of Jurai and her sister. Mihoshi here is a first class >galaxy police officer. Ryoko and Ryo-oki the former space pirates and >ofcourse Washu the greatest scientist in the universe." > Gene looked at Ryoko and Ryo-oki in total shock. The furry little >cabbit in her arms didn't look like a space pirate. He turned to Jim. >"How much is the bounty on those two?" Jim opened his computer and >scanned them. "Ryoko was pardoned due to the statute of limitations >but in her day was worth over ten million wong and twenty seven billion >Jurai. HAKYO: _And_ twenty seven billion Jurai? NODIN: That's a shitload of money! >Ryo-oki is was woth NODIN: What woth wee-ohwoky? Woth wee-ohwoky, woth I think she woth? HAKYO: Hey! Don't make fun of thpeech impedementh! >the same but she is reported to have been >pardoned.Wow Gene we should have gotten here earlier." >Ryoko looked at them and her eyes glowed red, "Are you two >bounty hunters by any chance?" They nodded. NODIN: With all this head shaking you'd think there would be an earthquake! >Tenchi stepped in. "Well >none of you is to harm anyone while you are in my house, is that >understood." Gene smiled and nodded. NODIN: HEP ME JEBUS, EVERYONE IS NODDING OFF! IT'S SHAKING THE HELL OUT OF ME! >"No problem your highness. >We aren't after you. We came looking for the galactic layline." HAKYO: Okay I can forgive that, I mean it is the sort of thing that is easy to misspell. NODIN: Yeah I guess, is that some sort of place to sleep? With everyone nodding off it makes sense. >Washu >looked up and smiled. "Oh is that all. Do you need a map?" Gene >looked at her in shock. "You know where it is?" Washu nodded. > Meanwhile Aisha had just finished grooming herself and had gotten >her first real look at the others. Her eyes traveled over them criticaly NODIN: The man has no use for spell check, or a thesaurus! >but stopped when they reached Washu. Instantly she bowned NODIN: Bound like book. Yeti… >to the >floor and started making guteral sounds in her throat. Washu smiled at >her pleasantly. "I see the Ctarl-Ctarl have not forgotten me. But you >can get up, I'm only human now." Aisha stood up still looking at Washu >with awe. Gene looked between them for a minute and said, "Does >anyone mind telling me what that was all about?" Washu looked at >Gene and grinned. "If you will all follow me to my lab I believe I can >explain." > She lead them into the broom closet. Along the way Gene's crew >kept looking at all the strange creatures Washu kept. Suzuka actualy >jumped as a huged snake-like creature with huge fangs NODIN: Look out! It is a huged huge singular L in the place of two such common letters, again and again and again! >snapped at her >before disapearing into the darkness of it's cage. Finaly NODIN: Good god man! Can't you just hit the damned L key more than once per word! Or does it disapear after one time? >they reached >the middle of the lab. Everyone found themselves in small desks while >Washu stood infront of them in her proffesor outfit. NODIN: Inbreading leeds to pore engrish skils. HAKYO: Yeah man you got the l33t skillz! >(Those of you not >interested in a long exposition may wish to read another story. I'm >sorry but sometimes a story needs explaining). Washu pulled down the >screen and addressed the class. > "Now, who had some questions?" Gene started to ask one when a >flowerpot landed on his head. "Please raise your hand before asking a >question." Suzuka smiled and raised her hand. Washu smiled and >looked at her. "Why did Aisha bow to you." Washu smiled and hit a >button on her computer. "Very good question." Three images appeared >on the screen. One was Washu in her adult form, one was Tsunami, >and the other was a lady none of them recognized. "When the universe >was created the gods were put incharge of making things. Me and my >sisters Tsunami and Tokimi were incharge of making one sentient NODIN: Well, the author, he is obviously not, _sentient_ that is. Because the cards, them they never lie! >race >each. Tsunami created the Juraians, Tokimi created humans, and I >created the Ctarl-Ctarl." She smirked and looked at Ryoko and >Ryo-oki. "Incase you can't tell I have a thing for cats." HAKYO: No neko! Kani! You love crabs! >Ryoko snorted. > Melfina raised her hand. "Um, if you're a goddess then what are you >doing here." Washu sighed and looked down. "I wanted to experience >life, love, and motherhood. I put most of my powers into three gems >and will not regain them unless I die or take the gems back. After that >I married a man and had a son. His family didn't like me so they took >them from me while he was away. I took on this child-like form and >later made Ryoko and Ryo-oki. I gave Ryoko my gems, but before I >could raise my daughters an evil man named Kagato took them from >me. For two thousand years he used her to destroy and pirate one >world after another." Ryoko frowned and looked down at her desk. >Tenchi reached over and rubbed her back and she smiled up at him >gratefully. > Jim raised his hand next. "Then how did you end up here?" Washu >pushed a button and a scene opened up before them. "As you can see >here Yosho defeted NODIN: Ah, de agoni of defet! HAKYO: Yes! I will defet you, then detrone you! Aha, you will be my defeted floe! >Ryoko and locked her in a cave for seven hundred >years. Then Tenchi released her. Kagato tracked down her readings >as did Ayeaka who was looking for Yosho. Kagato came and took >Ryoko. Then Tenchi went after him. Tsunami, who is bonded with >Sasami there, saved him when Kagato blasted the spaceship they were >in. Then he defeted Kagato. This freed me and we all went back here." > Aisha raised her hand last. "You mean to tell me all the times I prayed >to you were totaly useless?" Washu smiled and nodded. "Sorry. Try >praying to one of the other Ctarl-Ctarl gods." Suzuka was still looking >at Sasami who was sitting there politely quiet. Washu put her things >away and teleported them all back to the livingroom. Gene rubbed the >lump on his head. > Yosho looked at Tenchi, "Tenchi it's time for you to pracice." NODIN (as Yosho): Yes Tenchi, and do you know why? Because pracice builds dicipiline! >Tenchi >sighed. Yosho noticed the wooden sword on Suzuka's back. "Would >you care to help out young lady?" Suzuka smiled pleasantly. "I'm not >sure that would be a good idea. When I fight I fight until I win or am >defeted. HAKYO: That's twice now! >I have only been defeted HAKYO (as Goldfinger, yeah you heard me, Goldfinger!): Once is an accident, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action! >once." HAKYO: No, I said three times was! >She glanced at Gene who was >still looking at the other girls. Yosho grinned. "Then this will be good >training for Tenchi. Come on both of you." Suzuka shrugged and >followed as Yosho lead them away. > After they were gone Melfina went over to Washu. "Um... excuse me >miss. But do you think you can help me?" Washu looked up at her and >frowned, "No... not unless you call me little Washu." Melfina smiled >and said, "Please little Washu could you help me." Washu grinned and >nodded. NODIN: When wil her godforsaken nodding head finaly fal off? Stop grinning, it weakens your muscels! >"Sure thing, what do you need help with?" NODIN: I don't think they have a name for it yet. HAKYO: Probably somewhere along the lines of grammataphobia. >Melfina blushed >and said, "I need you to help me figure out who I am and why I was >made." > Washu laughed, "No problem. Just come back to my lab for afew >tests and we'll see what we can do." Melfina smiled and followed the >scientist to her lab. Jim watched them go and tapped Gene on the >shoulder. "Jim are you sure we can trust these people? I mean gods, >spacepirates, and royalty. It's all a bit much." Gene shrugged and >looked at him. "I think they're alright. I'm going to go get the Outlaw >Star out of the lake alright?" Jim nodded and sat back on the couch. >Mihoshi came over and sat with him when Gene was gone. "So you're >a bounty hunter?" Jim looked at her and said, "Yeah. Why? Think I'm >too young of something?" Mihoshi shook her head. > "Actually I was about your age when I strated in the Galaxy Police. I >just think bounty hunters are realy cool. NODIN: Realy? You realy realy do? Wow, that is realy cool! >But that friend of yours was >gining me the creeps looking at us like that." Jim chuckled and looked >out the window. "He's not usualy that bad. He just has a thing for pretty >girls. Don't worry about it." Mihoshi smiled and nodded. "Alright. I >wont hold that against him. Anyway I figure you two must be a good >team because you're still alive." He smiled at her and said thanks. She >then turned on the television and spaced out. > Meanwhile Sasami had gone to make lunch while Aisha was talking >with Ryoko. "So she's you're mom? You are so lucky." Ryoko >shrugged and looked away. "It's no big deal. She wasn't exactly able to >raise me ya know. Heck if it wasn't for Tenchi we'd both still be locked >up right now." Aisha smiled and nodded. "Hey Aisha, do you like that >Gene guy or something?" Aisha laughed and shook her head. "Nah, >he's cute but I'm not realy that interested in him. I'm just along to find >the Galactic layline. NODIN: Can I sleep on that? >" Ryoko raised and eyebrow. "What's that?" > Aisha shrugged. "It's the greatest treasure in the universe supposedly." >Ryoko smiled and shrugged. Suddenly Ayeaka came up and looked at >Aisha. "Hello. So you are from the Ctarl-Ctarl empire? I'd heard of you >but I'd never met one before." Ryoko snorted and mumbled, "Lucky >them." Ayeaka's face turned red and she turned on Ryoko. "What was >that you pirate?" Ryoko stepped up and pushed her face right into >Ayeaka's. "You heard me princess. What do you think you're going to >do about it?" Ayeaka jumped back and blasted at Ryoko. Ryoko >called up her forse field to block it and fired back. NODIN: A forse is a forse of course of course, and no one would talk to a forse of course, unless that forse of course of course was spelled like horse of course. >Aisha just sat there >and watched stunned. > > Tenchi bowed to Suzuka and held up the master key. He had said >that since she only had the wooden sword he should use one too, but >was shut up when she sliced through a rock with it. She smiled and >Yosho began the match. Tenchi started blocking jab after jab from >Suzuka. She pushed him to the edge before he got a foot hold. He >barely got his shield up before the beam she fired at him hit. "Hey you >could have killed me!" Suzuka nodded. "Yes. This is how I train.It's >all or none." HAKYO: Just like when we play dreidel! >Tenchi looked at Yosho and nodded. Tenchi shrugged >and threw his sword to the side. Suzuka smiled. "Does this mean that >you give up?" > Tenchi shook his head, :"No it just means that I'm using all my power >since you are." The light hawk wings appeared infront of him and >Suzuka gasped. "I thought only Jurai trees could do that!" Two of the >wings formed Tenchi's battle suit and the third became a sword in his >hand. Suzuka charged and Tenchi blocked her attack. Suzuka fired >another blast at him, but he formed a shield and blockled it. At the >same time she tripped him and he barely rolled out of the way before >her sword came down on his chest. Tenchi jumped up and swung his >sword at Suzuka. She blocked it with hers and jumped back holding >her sword infront of her. NODIN: To thefront, to theback, now allaround! > Suddenly her sword split and crumpled. Every hit it had taken from >Tenchi's sword showed as pieced fell off from it. She gapped as he >pointed his sword at her throat. "Give up?" She nodded numbly. NODIN: Aha, so she is getting tired of moving her head! >Tenchi >sent his sword and armor away and smiled appologeticaly. "Sorry >about your sword." She shrugged and tossed it away. "I have others. >Those are some impressive techniques. I'm glad we weren't fighting for >real." Tenchi smiled and rubbed the back of his head. > Yosho stepped forward and looked at Suzuka. "You have some very >impressive moves aswell. I get the feeling that in a real fight you may >be a match for almost anyone." She smiled pleasantly. After that they >all looked up as they heard an explosion from the house. Tenchi and >Yosho sighed. "What was that?" Suzuka asked. Tenchi smirked. "It >seems that Ayeaka and Ryoko are fighting again. I just hope they don't >destroy too much of the house this time." Suzuka looked at them in >suprise. Then followed as they lead the way back to the house. > By the time Tenchi and Yosho got there Ryoko and Ayeaka had >stopped fighting and Ryoko was talking with Aisha again. Aisha looked >at Ryoko and said, "Impressive, but I think I could take ya." Ryoko >laughed. "That? I just make that look hard so i don't embarrass the >princess. If I used my full power she'd be fried just from the >backwash." NODIN: Did she leave some spit in the back of her bottle? > Aisha grinned showing all her pointed teeth and Ryoko grinend back >showing her fangs. "I still think I could take you in a fight. After all we >Ctarl-Ctarl are immortal." Ryoko shrugged. "Well if you want to I >suppose I could go for it." Aisha looked up and saw the full moon in >the day sky. "Alright. Let's go." Tenchi came up behind them. "Hey you >two. If you want to play go to the training area." Ryoko smiled and >turned to Tenchi. "Oh Tenchi, you know I'd rather play with you any >time." She ran a hand down his chest. Tenchi's face turned red and a >drop of blood fell from his nose. He took off running for the house and >Ryoko sighed. > Suzuka looked at Yosho. "What was that all about?" Yosho grinend >and said, "He may be able to beat supervillains, but Ryoko can turn >him into putty." Suzuka smiled and nodded. "I see. Every warrior has >weakness's." Yosho looked at her as if to ask what her's were but she >walked into the house. > Aisha followed Ryoko to the training area. On the way they saw the >Outlaw star lifting out of the water and drying off. Once there each of >them stood on either side of the clearing. What followed was to quick >for me to see but it ended with both Aisha and Ryoko laying >unconsious on the ground. > > Melfina looked over Washu's shoulder. Washu had set up her >scanners and had instructed Melfina to get onto the table. "You don't >mind taking your clothes off do you?" Melfina shook her head. "No, I >have to when I navigate the Outlaw Star so it's no big deal." She took >off her clothes and lay down on the table. The scanners moved over >her slowly. NODIN: Those damn hentai scanners, they have all the fun! >They gthered information on every aspexct of her being. >"Very good work. They used some of my theories to give you a soul. >It seems you were designed to navigate that ship out there. You needed >a personality and human emotions so that unlike a machine you could >adapt to new situations. Considering that you are going to the galactic >lay line HAKYO: Well he may not have spelled it right, but atleast it is two words! >you'll need it." > Melphina looked up at her. "What is the galactic lay line?" NODIN: Hallelujah! He's done it again, praise the lord, praise him! HAKYO: But look how he spelled Melfina! The horror, the horror! It burns mommy, it burns! Washu >gave her a smirk and siad, "Oh I think you'll know it when you see it." >(I appologize for the cop out but the show had only been on a couple >weeks and they haven't gotten that far). "Oh, now this is very >interesting." Melfina got off the table and looked over Washu's shoulder >again. "What? What is it?" Washu smiled evily and looked at her. 'It >seems you have strong feelings for Gene." Melfina blushed and tried to >look away. "Oh don't be embarrassed. Does he like you too?" Melfina >blushed and frowned. "I have trouble sleeping when I'm not around him. >He... he tried to kiss me once. But I didn't feel right about it and pushed >him away." Washu nodded and turned back to the computer. > "Tenchi has a similar relationship with Ryoko. Maybe you should talk >to him about it." Melfin NODIN: Look, he did it again! Or is that just a terrible misspelling of the name Melvin? >looked up from where she had been putting her >clothes on. "Realy? NODIN: Yes, realy! >But Ryoko is so pretty. Why would Tenchi not like >her?" Washu laughed. "Not like her? That's not the problem. He likes >her just a bit too much and he can't handle it because he's too polite." >Washu did slightly envy her daughter. One thing she had noticed was >that while the others could make him freak out if they tried, only Ryoko >actualy made Tenchi's nose bleed. > When she turned around Melfina was gone. She was suprised but the >girl did have something to think about. Washu had to admit that the >technology that made Melfina was almost as advanced as what she'd >used to make Ryoko and Ryo-oki. The link with her ship though was >odd. It was a biomechanical interface that required direct contact in a >solution made of electrons. NODIN: Does that mean the problem was made of protons? >That meant she had to be in the solution for >her brainwaves to reach the ship while Ryoko could talk to Ryo-oki >without it. Washu decided to go over the information for a while, but >Sasami peeked in and called her for lunch. > When she got there the entire group was there. Even Ryoko and >Aisha had dragged themselves back in. Melfina had offered to help >Sasami set up but Sasami had explained that she liked cooking and >cleaning. "I know what you mean Sasami. It makes me feel useful to >do things like that too." Ryo-oki looked up and meowed at Melfina >who gave her a quick pet behind the ears before sitting down. > The newest people in the group said that Sasami's cooking was just >as good as Melfina's. Melfina and Sasami both blushed happily. They >all enjoyed the meal tremendously. After lunch Melfina went over to >Tenchi. "Can I talk with you?" Tenchi smiled and said sure. They >walked out the door while Ryoko and Ayeaka stared after jealously. >Ryoko appeaed infront HAKYO: Eww, that's disgusting! How foul can you get? of Tenchi and Melfina. "Now you don't so any >thing with Tenchi understand? He's mine." The she vanished again >before Ayeaka could get out a startled 'Is not he's mine'. NODIN: No! He be not yous, ungah! >Melfina >giggled and Tenchi rolled his eyes. They walked up the road to the >shrine. > "So what did you want to talk to me Melfina?" Melfina blushed and >looked at the ground. "Well Washu said you had a problem similar to >mind and said I should talk to you about it?" Tenchi looked at her >stangely, "What do you mean." Melfina took a deep breath. "Well I >kinda like Gene... but every time he makes a move on me I feel weird >and push him off. But I still like him. I like falling asleep when he's >around and I like his company most times." Tenchi nodded. "I know >what you mean. Ryoko is always hugging me and trying to get me to >have sex with her. NODIN: Oh baby! Tenchi's getting sugar tooonightaaa! >It realy makes me feel weird. But sometimes she can >be so nice. Like when she's watching the sky. She just seems so calm >and peaceful." Melfina smiled and they both got nastalgic looks. "I'm >not sure if I can help you with this Melfina. I have Ryoko and Ayeaka >fighting over me, plus I can't get up the courage to tell them how I realy >feel." > Melfina nodded understanding. "Well atleast they pay attention to you. >Gene keeps trying to get dates with every pretty girl we meet. And with >Aisha and Suzuka on board what chance do I have? I'm not realy that >pretty." NODIN: Oh come now, you are realy pretty! >tenchi smiled at her and shook his head. "You are too >Melphina. you're just different from them. Plus you have alot of very >good qualities." Melfina smiled up at him. "Realy?" he nodded and kept >walking. "How did you and Gene meet?" Melfina told him about how >Gene had opened the case she had been put in and let her out. Tenchi >smiled. "Ryoko and I met similarly. She was locked in that cave up >there for sevenhundred years." Tenchi told her about how he had >released Ryoko and what had happened at the school. After that they >walked in silence for a while. > Back at the house Suzuka sat quietly drinking some tea Sasami had >offered her and talking with the young princess. Sasami smiled >pleasantly and looked up at her. "What is an assasin anyway Suzuka? >I've heard the word before." Suzuka put her cup on the table and took >a long look at her before answering. "I kill people for money." Sasami's >eyes got big. "You mean like pirates and bad guys?" Sazuka.nodded >and said, "Usualy. But if the money is right and I want the job I will >kill anyone." Sasami frowned and looekd into her tea. "That doesn't >sound very nice. Why hurt someone who hasn' t done anything wrong? >Don't you get enough money fromt the bad guys?" Suzuka shook her >head and sipped her tea. "No, I have... expenses. And I don't see what >makes you a judge of what is right and wrong." Sasami grinned and >said, "Oh that's easy. She does." Sasami pointed to the mirror on the >wall next to the table. > Suzuka looked up and saw herself sitting there drinking tea, but in >Sasami's place was a woman in white robes with long blue hair and >two spots on her head. Suzuka looked between Sasami and her >reflection obviously shocked. "You... you realy are a goddess!" HAKYO: Yes, she realy is! >Sasami >giggled and shook her head. "No, not yet. We wont full merge until I >look like her. But anyway Tsunami always told me that killing innocent >people was wrong." Tsunami turned and stepped out of the mirror. >"It is especialy wrong if you are doing it simply to support your >gambling habit with the blood of innocents." Suzuka gasped then >frowned at Tsunami. "Nobody is truely innocent in this world. Tsunami >raised an eyebrow. "Is that so? Well maybe but I still think that in the >future you may want to consider what you do more carefuly." Then >tsunami vanished before Suzuka could respond. Sasami sighed. "Sorry, >she does that." Suzuka looked at the little girl closely. Then with a >single >tear falling from her eye she got up and walked outside. > Gene. Jim, and Mihoshi were buisy shining the hull of the Outlaw Star >when Suzuka came out. Gene looked up and saw Sazuka's tear. "Are >you alright Suzuka?" Suzuka just turned and walked off into the woods. >One of Gilliam's robots worked it's way over to him. "I think one of you >should go talk to her. She seems to be highly distressed." Gene and Jim >looked at eachother. "Don't look at me, all I ever manage to do is >make girls angry," Gene said. Jim sighed and walked after her. > Jim found Suzuka sitting alone on a boulder. She had no more tears >and her face was decptively calm. "Suzuka, are you alright?" She didn't >answer. Jim walked over and set on the rock next to her. "Did >something happen? Are you hurt?" Suzuka smiled lightly and looked at >him. "Never get into a discussion of right and wrong with a god." She >told Jim what had happened with Sasami. Jim just rubbed his head. >"I'm sorry Suzuka, but I don't know what to say about this. You're my >friend and all and you're moves are realy great especially when we are >fighting the pirates. But..." Suzuka looked up at him. Sighing she shook >her head. "I know Gene. NODIN: Well I know Gene too, but is he here right now? That's why her words hurt so much. I have >done a great many evil things in my life. And I never can stop because >I loose the money almost as soon as I get it." > "What do you mean?" She smiled and leaned back a bit tapping her >new wooden sword on the rock. "I gamble alot. I just can't stop >myself. That's where I go when I disapear on the worlds we visit. I >even bet on the Outlaw Star durring the race you were in." She looked HAKYO (as the author): Gee, why don't spel a gret many words incorectlly? >at him closely. "You wont tell Gene that will you?" Jim smiled and >shook his head. "No, but I think I can help you. I bet you a thousand >wong that you can't stop gambling." Suzuka smiled and said, "Deal!" >Jim help out his hand and motioned for her to pay up. Suzuka smacked >her forehead and then reached into her clother to fork over the money. > Jim put it in his pocket and smiled. "Now whenever you feel the urge >to gamble just come to me and we'll make the same bet." Suzuka >laughed. "I am not going to fall for that one again... Oh I see what you >mean. How did you learn that?" Jim leaned back and looekd up at the >sky. "Gene had a similar problem once. Ofcourse he lost twenty >thousand to me before he stopped, but I'm not complaining." They >both laughed. Suzuka looked up at the sky. "You know I think she was >right." Jim looked over at her. "About what Suzuka?" She was looking >into the woods. "I think I need to think more before I take a job. I >don't think I want to kill innocent people anymore." Jim nodded and >smiled at her. "I think that's a good attitude Suzuka." > > Ayeaka had goen inside to watch her afternoon soap opera's, while >Ryoko and Aisha still sat outside. Ryoko's eyes had beenglues on the >path to the cave since Tenchi and Melfina had gone up to the shrine. >Aisha had been trying to talk to you but Ryoko was too ditracted. >Finaly she came out and asked what was wrong. Ryoko looked at her >and sighed. "I get a little worried when Tenchi isn't around." Aisha >smiled. "Well you don't have to worry about Melfina. She like Gene." NODIN: Me am Nodin, me lika the Gene too. >Ryoko smirked, "And how would you know that?" Aisha pointed to >her nose. "Feramones. Can't you smell them? She let's them off around Gene >like you wouldn't believe. HAKYO: Well if she is an android, something lacking in _pheromone_ glands, then she must produce a lot of them. >Just like you and Tenchi do." She >teased. Ryoko blushed and looked away. "All i ever smell on Tenchi >is fear." She told Aisha about the time she had chased Tenchi down at >the school. Melfina laughed. "Well he sure didn't smeel scared... atleast >not of you directly. He actually seems to like you quite a bit." Ryoko >snorted and shook her head. "Oh yeah, then why does he always run >away from me when I try to get near him." > Aisha shrugged. "I don't know. Melfina does the same when Gene >tries to hit on her. Until then she seems to want to be near him all the >time, but the second he tries to pay any attention to her she get's all >edgy." Aisha twitched her tail and smiled. Ryoko frowned and twitched >her tail at the same time. "You mean she likes him until he starts trying >to like her too?" Aisha nodded. "Yeah. If Gene is just sitting there >quietly she'll go stand with him, or if he needs something she's the first >to volunteer to help out. And she realy enjoys his compliments. But >when he tries to kiss her..." Ryoko finished the statement, "...she runs." >Ryoko bit her lip thinking. There had been times when she had not >been payig attention and Tenchi had set down with her. When she had >realized he was there she had blushed and left. But now she wondered >exactly what would have happend if she had stayed put. > Gene came around the corner. He had heard every word they had >said, but pretended he didn't. "Aisha the ships ready when you are. >And we can finaly find the galactic lay line." NODIN: 5,4,3,2,1… LET'S RIP THEM A NEW ONE!!! >Aisha smiled and got up. >Ryoko shook her hand. "Come visit when you can guys." They nodded >and Gene turned around. Jim and Suzuka came out of the woods at the >same time Tenchi and Melfina came around the corner from the shrine. >"Hey guys, good timing. It's time to go." The crew of the Outlaw Star >gathered near the hatch to the ship. Once they had said their goodbyes >to everyone they turned to leave. Once they were inside Gene and >Melfina looked at eachother and said, "Can we talk later?" The other >members of the crew includign Gilliam snored and whispered, "It's >about time." Melfina and Gene blushed and quickly ran to their >positions. > As the ship took off into space Tenchi was still smiling. "You know >that wasn't so bad. For once people came who weren't trying to kill >us." The others giggled and went inside. > >The end > >Autho's note. > Well it's done. An Outlaw Star crossover. I know I didn't solve any >of the usual problem i do, Kyonei wasn't here, and the explanations >went a bit long, but all in all not a bad story wouldn't you agree? >Send any comments to clayton_n@hotmail.com Hakyo closes the fic, sweatdropping. HAKYO: That was one of the worst fanfics I ever read! NODIN: Ditto. That _realy_ sucked. HAKYO: Say, I just thought of something… NODIN: What? HAKYO: Remember on MST3K, the original bad guy? Dr. Forrester? NODIN: Yeah. Why? HAKYO: His name was Clayton too… NODIN: Do you have a point? Hakyo grins like a madman. HAKYO: None at all! Nodin bops Hakyo over the head with a folding chair. NODIN: Hakyo no mudabone baka! MST2K1's _Autho's_ notes: NODIN: Well over all except for the spelling mistakes, grammar mistakes, and complete lack of secondary L's or the fact that the autho felt no need for punctuation of any kind, this fan-fic…..Sucked! this could have been a realy good fan-fic except for one factor, the autho. Also I think the only word where he had two letters that were the same right after one another in one word, must have been fluss. Now, not only is fluss spelled wrong, but fluss isn't even a word! If you can find a definition for or even make up a meaning for "fluss" please tell me. Oh and by the way if you want to attempt a fan-fic of seismicaly crap ass proportions, please use a spell-checker! Please! Trust me, it will realy, realy, help you! HAKYO: Before we wrote this MST, I E-mailed Mr. Overstreet, respectfully pointing out his errors. He responded, agreeing that he written it poorly, saying it had been a rush job, as I thought. He pointed me toward his other fiction, claiming it would be better. Folks, this man has no sense of spelling or story. He has no idea how to spell Kiyone, and despite there being two acceptable spellings for Ayeka/Aeka, he misspells that as well! He claimed that he had misspelled Ryoko, but he actually had used an acceptable spelling! Furthermore, he seems to be one of those psychotics who believes that Mihoshi and Kiyone are lesbian lovers. Folks, do not read this man's fanfics. He is dangerous to your sanity. After all, I read some, and look at me!