**Note:  If you want to read a much prettier version (with an illustration 
too!) of this story go to: 

http://w3.one.net/~shire/DianeLong/stories/LittleRyoko.html


This story is based on the OVA continuum.


Little Ryoko

By Diane Long

Blue shades of twilight caught in Ryoko's ice green hair as she sat on the 
couch and sipped from her small cup.  The sake was just the right 
temperature and felt warm and smooth as she rolled it around her mouth.  
This was the good stuff, the kind you savored slowly instead of gulping 
down for the mere purpose of intoxication.  She took another sip and tried 
not to look at the others as they laughed over something on the other couch.  
They sounded like they were having so much fun.  And here she was, all by 
herself on the other couch.  Even Ryo-Ohki was with them.  She took 
another sip, her brow creasing almost imperceptibly.  What were laughing 
about?  Was it her?

She bit her lip and hunched her shoulders, resenting their fun and feeling 
terribly isolated.  Should she go over there and join in?  She slid a yellow 
eye over in their direction and took in their happy faces.  She should just go 
over and watch, maybe they would let her join in and laugh with them.

Yeah right.  She would do something wrong and Ayeka would get mad.  
Then the rest would be angry too, and blame Ryoko for ruining the fun.  She 
closed her eyes, the longing for companionship a twisting pain deep inside 
of her.

Across the room, Washu's head jerked up, her long pinkish red hair flying.  
An adult in a 12-year-old body, she seemed diminutive on her hovering 
purple cushion as she worked on her holographic laptop. Her fingers paused 
above the keyboard as a dim echo of heartache reverberated through her 
mental link with Ryoko.  Washu absently saved her work before banishing 
her portable console. A look of regret passed over her features as she studied 
her daughter.  If she hadn't felt that nanosecond of pain, she would have 
thought Ryoko was sulking.  On the surface Ryoko appeared bored and 
disinterested in the activities of the others. But, oh, Washu knew so much 
better.  The little Ryoko she used to know had been such a tender child.

.... Sunlight splashed into Washu's library, 
catching on the dust motes as they spun through 
the currents of the air.

"Little Ryoko," an adult Washu called as she 
poked her head around a tall shelving unit made of 
a deep red wood.  "Where are you?"  She listened 
with a small smile.  Her daughter was anything but 
silent. She would give herself away soon enough.

"Ryoko, don't tease mommy now."

Something rustled high above Washu's head.  She 
looked up to see her toddler precariously balanced 
on the top edge of a twenty-foot high bookshelf.  
The youngster laughed at being caught red-handed  
and called down "Hello mama!" in a squeaky 
chirrup. Ryoko's hair was caught up in a simple 
yet spiky ponytail, tied with a teal ribbon.  Her teal 
and pink dress was covered with the dust that 
covered the top of the shelves.

"Hello indeed," muttered Washu.  "How did you 
get up there little Ryoko?"  Thank goodness she 
hadn't imbued Ryoko with her powers yet.  The 
last thing she needed was a teleporting three year-
old.

"Climbed!" Ryoko said proudly.

Washu shook her head and began to slide a 
wheeled ladder over when Ryoko lost her balance 
and tipped over the edge with a shriek.

"RYOKO!"

Washu dashed under her daughter and caught her 
as she tumbled down.  "That," she said crossly, "is 
why mommy tells you not to climb so high!"  She 
emphasized her point with a gentle shake.

Ryoko looked up at her with big yellow eyes and a 
puckered mouth.  She sniffed and fat tears began to 
run down her cheeks.  "I'm sorry. S-sorry, 
mommy. Don't be mad."

"Oh, little one." Washu held Ryoko close, and felt 
the warm tears against her neck.  "Don't cry.  I `m 
not mad.  I just don't want you to get hurt. I love 
you."

Ryoko's little arms stretched to get around 
Washu's neck as she nodded.  

Washu squeezed her again.  "I have an idea!  Let's 
go turn the gravity off in the lab so we can fly!"

"Okay!" Ryoko said excitedly, her tears stopped.  
She wriggled out of Washu's arms and raced off 
towards the lab. "

....Washu drifted back to the present. So much had changed.  When she had 
first seen Ryoko after her own release from Kagato she had been 
heartbroken to see her daughter so changed.  But quickly she saw through 
the defenses her poor darling had crafted over thousands of years to protect 
herself.  On the surface, she was tough, selfish, and insolent.  She swaggered 
around with a firm shield of protective bravado.  Ryoko would like the 
others to think she didn't really need anyone, that she was self-contained.  
Sometimes it seemed to Washu that Ryoko had emerged from that cave with 
the body of a seventeen year-old young woman, and the mind of an eight 
year-old child.  Despite Ryoko's long life, she had no memories of anything 
from her free past.  All of her memories were of her time of enslavement and 
destruction.  The day she emerged from the cave was in many ways the first 
day of her life.  And she had been struggling ever since to fit in, to be as 
normal as it was possible to be around here.  And, damn if she didn't do 
surprisingly well for someone with absolutely no social skills.  It was crude 
of course, with her few strategies to prosocialy interact often degrading into 
a genuinely child-like display of self-centeredness.  If Ryoko couldn't figure 
out how to ask someone for something she needed, she would just take it.  It 
was the only thing that had been 100% successful for her in the past, so with 
out even meaning to she often used this skill when she got frustrated with 
people.

Washu sighed.  This made others see her as less desirable, and often Ryoko 
was left out of conversations and activities. Like tonight for example.  While 
Ryoko sat on the couch with and pretended to be coolly enjoying her drink, 
the rest of the youngsters were crowded on the other couch excitedly 
babbling over which television show to watch.  Ryoko pretended to look out 
the window at the moon over the lake, but Washu could see that every so 
often she peeked at the group out of the corner of her right eye.  Washu 
could still feel Ryoko's wish to be invited to join them, to be included.

Ryoko had been damaged. There was such hurt in her.  So much pain.  
Washu knew only the general story of the horrors she had gone through with 
Kagato, but did not know the details because the strength of her link to 
Ryoko had been diminished by the nature of her own imprisonment. And the 
difference was always in the details.  For almost 2000 years, this child had 
been abused in countless ways.  What must that have done to her soul? Now 
she was free, but she was still imprisoned by her past

Washu cleared her throat. "Hmmmm. There are so many good choices 
tonight.  What do you think Ryoko?"

"That's right!" Sasami bounded over to Ryoko with the television guide in 
her hands.  "Ryoko can help us!"

Sasami pointed to two spots on the guide's page and looked up at Ryoko. 
"We've narrowed it down to these two. Which would you like to watch?"

Washu smiled at the younger girl's sweetness, then her smile slipped as she 
felt a pulse of panic from Ryoko.  Washu arched an eyebrow and carefully 
observed what was happening.

Ryoko fussed with putting her glass down in just the right spot, looking 
bored. She took hold of the TV guide, her eyes scanning the page. "Hmmm, 
they both look good.  Which do you want to watch, Sasami?"

Sasami giggled and rocked back on her heels.   "Well, I want to watch the 
love story personally.  But I really thought you would want to watch the 
Battle Action Droids!"

Ryoko smiled hugely.  "Yeah!  I wanna watch the Battle Action Droids! 
That's my favorite show!" she said pointing to a listing in the book.

Sasami giggled again.  "Silly! You were pointing to the love story! So I 
guess that's what we are going to watch!"

"Hey!" sputtered Ryoko.  "It was a simple mistake."

"Too bad, Ryoko," Tenchi said kindly.  "Next time you should pay closer 
attention."

Ryoko blushed and turned away, looking out of the window again.

Washu's other eyebrow joined it's twin in a high position on her forehead.  
No way.  It couldn't be.  Could it? She thought back.


...."But MO-OM, it says here that the particle 
rays should be set to have an INVERSE reaction to 
the study medium.  You set it up wrong!" said an 
adolescent Ryoko, her nose deep within a thick 
manual.  She was lying on her stomach atop a 
floating cushion, kicking her long legs as she read.  
Next to her Washu was setting up cell cultures in a 
gelatin medium.

Washu raised her safety glasses and looked at 
Ryoko skeptically.  "Are you sure?"

"Yes. It says so right here," Ryoko said obviously 
preparing to read out-loud.

"Alright, alright," Washu conceded and flipped a 
switch on the particle accelerator.  She looked 
back to Ryoko and noticed that her daughter was 
being suspiciously silent.  Moving quietly, she 
peeked over the large manual and saw that Ryoko 
had hidden a paper back romance inside.

"Ryoko!  You were supposed to be helping me 
with this experiment!"

"Aren't I?" came the innocent reply.

"I wouldn't classify recreational reading as a 
crucial step in the scientific method, no."

"Mom, you know I only have to read it once to get 
it perfectly.  We've been at this for HOURS.  I'm 
bored."

Washu smiled.  "Having an obscenely brilliant 
daughter makes more work for a mom!" she said 
happily.

Ryoko giggled.

"I see your favorite creation is once more flexing 
the muscles of independence," came a quiet voice 
from behind Washu. The voice was darkly
masculine, with an undisguised self-confidence. 

Washu raised an eyebrow. Why
hadn't she noticed his entry? Children are such a 
distraction ...

Ryoko stiffened but didn't look up from her book.  
"Mom said not to call me that."

"My apologies, dear Ryoko."

Ryoko ignored him.

Washu sighed. "Yes, Kagato?"

"Professor, I need you to sign this form so I might 
begin my dissertation proposal." A tall young man 
with long pale hair and tiny round glasses handed 
her a slip of paper.

"Certainly. I'm glad you are getting started with 
that. You don't want to be a student for your entire 
life, you know!"  She smiled warmly.  Kagato was 
one of her best students, even if he was jealous of 
Ryoko.  She signed the form and handed it back to 
him.

"Indeed not professor."  He swept out of the door.

Washu returned to setting up the experiment.  
"How many pulses, little Ryoko?"

"Three," came the distracted reply.

"That must be some book," Washu said as she 
raised the protective shield.  "I hope it's age 
appropriate."

A strangled sound told her it wasn't.  Washu 
smiled and started up the particle accelerator.  Ah 
well. Girls would be girls.

....Again Washu snapped back to the present.  Ryoko had loved to read. And 
yet now that she was free, Washu had never seen her reading anything but 
manga.  Washu looked up at Ryoko's favored rafter.  There really should be 
piles of books up there.  A deep feeling of sadness crept over her.  Oh this 
couldn't be true.  To deny such a brilliant mind intellectual stimulation was 
the cruelest of tortures. No wonder Ryoko became so frustrated so easily.  
On some level she must remember that she used to understand things 
effortlessly.  She must sense the difference.  Washu hugged herself briefly, 
loathing the mere of idea of how horrible that must be.  She forced herself to 
relax her arms and behave normally.  

She summoned her computer, started typing again and casually asked, "So 
when does Battle Action Droids begin?"

"We are going to watch the other one little Washu," Sasami called out.

"What? The love story? Yuck!  The greatest scientific genius in the universe 
isn't interested in mush.  I wanna see things blow up!"

"I'm sorry Miss. Washu, but we have already voted," said Ayeka with a 
polite sniff.

"Hmmmm.  I think I'm going to go watch it in the lab.  Anyone else 
interested?"  She forced herself to not look in Ryoko's direction. Any 
prompting at all would make her suspicious.

"Really?  I didn't know you get TV shows in the lab," said Ryoko 
interestedly.

Washu looked back over her shoulder with an expression that said, `You 
have to ask?'

Ryoko shrugged.  "Yeah, right. Sure, count me in." She grabbed the sake 
and stalked towards the kitchen.

Washu followed behind her without waiting to see of there were any other 
takers.  She heard Ryoko rattling around in the cupboards as she slipped into 
her lab.  Pressing buttons and flipping switches, Washu caused several 
plump floor cushions to appear in front of her largest display screen, while 
most of the larger equipment slid into the walls to create more space.  A 
quick adjustment of a knob captured earthly television signals and isolated 
the appropriate channel.

As Washu settled on a cushion to await Ryoko, she heard the bell above her 
lab door tinkle softly.  "I'm over hear, can you find me?" she called.

"Yup," Ryoko said as she settled unto a cushion besides Washu.  Without a 
word she set down a bottle of sake and two cups between them.

Washu's throat closed tightly at the gesture.  "Thank you," she said softly.

"For what? Oh that, trust me you need to drink to get the most out of this 
show."

"Ah," Washu said simply, retrieving a large bowl of buttered popcorn from a 
dimensional pocket.


They watched the show together, both laughing and the terribly contrived 
plots that were constructed to fit in as many spectacular explosions as 
possible in a half an hour.  Soon the sake was gone and only crumbs and  un-
popped kernels of corn remained at the bottom of the bowl.  As the end 
credits began to roll both women stayed silent as if loath to interrupt how 
nice being together felt.

"Well." Ryoko fiddled with a tassel of the cushion.  "I guess I should get 
going."

"Ryoko."

"What?" Ryoko asked with trepidation, something about Washu's emotional 
tone worried her.

"That cushion is yours."

"Excuse me?" Ryoko ran a hand over the plush teal fabric with confusion.

Washu pointed to her own purple cushion.  "It's just like mine, but in your 
favorite colour."

Ryoko smiled. Well, teal was her favorite colour.  "You made this for me 
just now?"

"No.  Thousands of years ago.  We used them together when we worked side 
by side."

Ryoko was silent, her hands rubbing the fabric as if trying to conjure a 
memory.

Washu sighed softly.  "Don't you remember anything?"

"You know I don't," Ryoko said annoyance creeping into her voice.  How 
many times were they going to have this conversation anyway?

"I know. It's just that I wish that you could."

"Why?"

"Because if you had the same memories I do, you wouldn't push me away," 
Washu murmured.

Ryoko slumped back into her pillow, suddenly feeling very weary.  "I don't 
do it to hurt you Washu."

"I know.  But it's only after your merging with Zero that we have been able 
to address this at all."

"Don't think I'm going soft," Ryoko said stiffly, looking down into her lap.

"But you are safe now, you don't have to be so strong."

"What are you talking about?" Ryoko snapped looking up again.  She 
faltered when she saw Washu in her adult form, her face inches from her 
own.

Washu smiled sadly and stroked Ryoko's cheek.  "We both know I am 
talking about Kagato and the way you became to keep yourself safe."

"Mom?"  Ryoko croaked.

"Little Ryoko, I want to try and see if I can retrieve any of your memories.  
You were happy once.  I want you to know how that feels."

"Who cares?" Ryoko asked with only a shadow of her usual sarcasm.

"I do. Can I try?  I'll need your help.  I can't do this by myself."

"Don't get your hopes up.  No matter who I used to be, I'm different now. 
There is no going back."

A small tear clung to the corner of Washu's eyelid.  "I know."

"I don't want to remember.  I need to go." Ryoko scrambled to her feet and 
hurried away.

Chapter Two


Later that night, Ryoko sat on her rafter and brooded as the rest of the house 
silently slipped into sleep.  Damn that Washu.  Couldn't she leave well 
enough alone?  She clenched her fist until her nails dug painfully into her 
palm.  Washu had no idea of just how much she was asking.  How could she 
bear to remember those days, those happy days when she was an innocent.  
All of the memories she had left were dark and horrific.  She had done such 
heinous things.  That she had been forced to do them all didn't change the 
front row view of her memory.  Every act of atrocity was branded into her 
mind painted with vivid emotions and pain.  She remembered the screams, 
and the smells.  The smells were the worst.  She couldn't be near a barbecue 
with out having getting violently ill.  Not only did she remember the things 
she had done, her body remembered how it had felt to do them.  And almost 
as bad were the memories of Kagato.

...."Ryoko, pet, come and pour me a glass of 
wine."

Shaking, a skinny teenaged girl bearing a wine 
carafe on a silver tray darted out from the shadows 
and hurried over to his side.  Her head was bowed, 
allowing her long hair to fall over her face so she 
could avoid his eyes.  The wine splashed as her 
hands trembled.

"Don't drip," he said with a calm fury that she had 
learned to fear.

"Yes, sir," she squeaked.

Suddenly his fist swept up and knocked the tray 
out of her hands. It clattered to the floor as the 
carafe smashed beside it, leaving a puddle of 
burgundy liquid seeping out from the shards of 
glass.

"Enough of this simpering!  I despise it."  Kagato 
grabbed Ryoko's shoulders and shook her hard 
enough to make her head snap painfully 
backwards.

"You can destroy planets Ryoko, and yet you 
tremble like a rabbit.  You disgust me." He flung 
her down to her knees and towered over her.

"You are nothing but waste. Defective!  All of that 
power and such a weak will.  I should destroy you 
right now."

Ryoko cowered on the floor as sharp bits of glass 
dug into the tender flesh of her knees.  She felt her 
teeth begin to chatter, and tried so hard to make it 
stop.  Any further signs of weakness from her and 
he would become more violent.

But he saw. He always did.  "You need to be 
stronger Ryoko!  Strong like a stone!"  He 
gestured with right index finger and Ryoko felt her 
arm tingle and grow denser.

She clutched at her arm and screamed in pain as 
the stone transformation spread upwards.

Kagato laughed heartily to see her so fully under 
his power.

Panicked, Ryoko struggled to her feet.  "Stop it!" 
she yelled swinging her stone arm at his face. 
"Leave me alone!"

Kagato stopped laughing and ducked before 
returning the blow with a punch that sent her 
flying into the far wall.

"Well, my, my.  You are showing some promise 
after all."

Kagato stalked over to where she lay in a stunned 
heap at the base of the wall, a small stream of 
blood trickling from a gash on her lip.  He grabbed 
a handful of her hair and pulled her off the ground, 
so high that her feet were dangling in the air.

She groaned in pain as he ground her into the wall 
and kissed her bloody lips.  She knew what was 
coming. She hated what was coming next.

"Yes," he said licking her blood from his lips.  
"You are coming along my dear.  I think I'll spare 
you for now.  Let's celebrate."

Tears slipped out from beneath Ryoko's lashes as 
she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to do the same 
with her mind.

"Oh such emotion," he mocked.  "You aren't real 
you know.  You are just a creation of mine.  I'll 
just throw you away if you don't please me.  
Understand?"

....Ryoko glared into the darkness of the Masaki living room.  She had 
understood all right.  That was the beginning of the end for her.  She had 
become what she had needed to survive.  And it had replaced the person she 
used to be, and the problem was that the old Ryoko would never come back.  
She had been destroyed by Kagato. That wouldn't matter so much, except 
that since Ryoko had merged with Zero she suddenly had something internal 
to compare her current self against.  The innocent, tenderhearted Zero was 
the projection of who Ryoko should have grown up to be, and the 
comparison between this and what she had become instead haunted her.  She 
now had a sense of how warped and abnormal she was.  Could she stand to 
have other memories, to learn even more clearly of what she had lost? Her 
mind said no, but a small voice in her heart was curious to know anyway.  
Damn that Zero. And Damn Washu.  No, one could understand how she felt.  
No one. She teleported to the roof top to watch the moon and stars tracing 
across the sky.  It was going to be a long night.


The next morning Ryoko drifted to the breakfast table feeling crankier than 
usual.  She rarely slept, but last night's endless hours of remembering had 
exhausted her like nothing else could.  As soon as breakfast was finished, 
she was going to catch a few Z's in her favorite tree.  She ignored the others 
and reached for a bowl of rice.

"My, my, it looks like we had a rough night.AGAIN," simpered Ayeka 
from behind her cup of tea.

Ryoko's lip curled in agitation but she said nothing.  She focused on the 
food, enjoying the texture.  Rice had such a nice, firm feel to it.  

Ayeka looked at Ryoko in annoyance. Why wasn't she rising to the bait?  
"Ryoko, it's the shame the way your little sake problem drains the family 
resources. It's selfish really."

Ryoko focused on chasing the last grain of rice in her bowl with her 
chopsticks.  "I wasn't drinking last night, Princess." Maybe breakfast wasn't 
such a good idea this morning. She didn't need it anyway.  She just ate to be 
like them, to be normal.  Well, forget it.  

She was teleporting away when she heard Ayeka speak again.  "Well, you 
look exhausted. You were up to SOMETHING last night."

Ryoko reappeared at the table with the low sound of  matter transfer.

"Say that again," she growled angry that her pain was being mocked.

::Tell them the truth then!:: said Washu into her mind.

Ryoko's eyes slid over to the again adolescent Washu, while the rest of her 
body remained perfectly still.  Washu sat with her rice bowl held close under 
her chin, the tips of her chopsticks between her lips.  She met her daughter's 
eyes calmly and tried to give her an encouraging look.

::If you don't tell them you were tormented by memories of your past, they 
can't understand.!::

::. . . .:: Ryoko replied in a wordless rush of unhappiness.

::Then I'll tell them!::

"No!" Ryoko shouted out-loud, drawing shocked looks.

Washu set down her bowl and balanced her utensils across its brim as she 
cleared her throat.  "The fact of the matter is that little Ryoko spent the 
entire night agonizing over her past."

"Washu!" Ryoko shouted, slamming her fist on the table, taking off a chunk 
of the edge. "Shut the hell up!"

Washu frowned and stood up, placing both palms on the table as she leaned 
forward.  "CALL ME MOM!"  As she spoke her body morphed into her 
adult form, a stern parental expression on her face.

Ryoko's eyes widened and for a moment she was shocked into silence.

Washu placed her hands on her hips and continued.  "As I was saying, you 
spent all of last night remembering what it felt like when Kagato hurt you 
and made you hurt other people.  You were in so much agony that I had to 
take three full strength tranquilizers to get any sleep at all. Even blocking 
our link couldn't seal off your pain!"

Ryoko's hands flew up to hide her face. "Stop, please stop. Don't tell."

Washu snorted.  "Don't tell them what? That Kagato took a sweet, smart, 
wonderful little girl and twisted her soul? Took away her mother?  Took 
away her freedom? Erased your memories of her childhood? Happy 
memories Ryoko!"

Ryoko cried softly into her hands. The rest of the table watched the 
interaction between mother and daughter in stunned silence.

"Ryoko, please let me give you your good memories back. You can find 
your way back to yourself."

Ryoko's back stiffened.  She uncovered her face and scrubbed away her 
tears with the backs of her hands.  Her lips twisted into a sneer.  "You think 
you know so much.  I like who I am now.  I don't want anything you have to 
offer."

Washu's mouth puckered in a mixture of hurt and annoyance.  "Not even the 
ability to read again, my little Ryoko?"

Tenchi's eyes widened.  "You can't read?" he whispered.

"You cannot read?" asked Ayeka incredulously.  Her eyes widened with true 
concern.  She might taunt Ryoko from time to time, but she never truly 
wished harm on her rival.  "Oh, Ryoko that's." she faltered seeing Ryoko 
slide near tears again.  "That's so. predictable," she finished lamely, 
hoping a dash of their semi-friendly verbal sparing might help re-orient 
Ryoko.

It didn't.

Ryoko turned red with humiliation and hung her head.  "I'll never forgive 
you Washu," she hissed as she phased straight down through the floor.

Washu sagged to the table, reverting to her child-like appearance.  "What 
have I done?"

Tenchi scooted over to her and laid a hand on her shoulder.  "What was that 
all about?"

"I was just trying to help Ryoko be more honest about her feelings."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm sorry Tenchi, but I've already said too much." Washu got to her feet 
and strode off to her lab and quickly vanished behind the door. This time the 
door vanished too.  No one was going to have access to her today.

Tenchi scratched his head.  "Ryoko can't read?"

"Oh that's just horrible!" Sasami looked up at Tenchi with sad eyes. "She 
must be so embarrassed.  Washu shouldn't have told!  And she didn't get to 
finish her breakfast.  She'll be so hungry."

"Of course she can't read," Ayeka said sadly.  "Think of what she has been 
through

Tenchi frowned.  "We can't really understand the things Ryoko has been 
through.  But we can try to help her now."

"That's right Tenchi.  I bet she needs us, and her breakfast," Sasami stated 
gathering up the remainder of Ryoko's food.  "Let's go find her!"

Tenchi got to his feet.  "Right.  Ayeka, are you coming with us?"

Ayeka flushed.  " No, I'll just make things worse, Lord Tenchi."

Sasami set a medium sized wicker basket on the table and began loading it 
with Ryoko's leftovers, some fruit and bottled water.  "How can you say that 
Ayeka?  Ryoko is your friend."

"She and I don't have that kind of friendship.  I know she would prefer I stay 
away," Ayeka sniffed.  "I'm going to do the laundry."

Sasami shrugged and hefted the basket into her arms.  "Ready, Tenchi?"

Tenchi smiled and took the basket.  "Yes, let's go.  Where do you think she 
went?"

"I have an idea. Follow me!" Sasami said, hurrying towards the door.

Half an hour later, Tenchi and Sasami were a mile up the mountainside and 
standing in a thick copse of trees.  At the very top of the tallest tree was a 
small, enclosed tree house.

Tenchi shielded his eyes from the sun and squinted up at the tree house.  
"What's this?"

Sasami giggled.  "It's Ryoko's private place.  Ryo-Ohki brought me here 
once."

"Huh, I wonder why she made it."

Sasami looked up at where Ryo-Ohki was perched at the top of her head and 
listened to the soft meows of her little friend.  "I think Ryoko comes here 
when she is sad.  Tenchi, Ryoko comes here a lot."


Tenchi approached the bottom of the tree.  It seemed fitting that he be the 
one to go up there and talk to her.  After all, he was her friend.

"Tenchi?"  Sasami laid a hand on his shoulder.

He stopped and looked down at her.  "Yes?"

"Tenchi, I don't think you should go up there."

"Why not?"

"It's hard to explain.  Let me go okay?"

Tenchi scratched his head.  "I guess so."

"You're a good boy Tenchi!" Sasami said sweetly and wrapped her hands 
around Ryo-Ohki and soon the two of them levitated towards the small 
wooden structure.

Tenchi didn't want to be a good boy. He wanted to understand what was 
wrong with one of his friends.  Instead he sat on the ground and waited. 
Sasami was usually right about these sorts of things.


Inside her tree house, Ryoko was lying on the floor curled into a ball.  Now 
they knew.  And it was just like Ayeka to mock her for it. It was the perfect 
weakness to exploit.  How could Washu have told them?  And how did 
Washu know anyway?  Ryoko had been so careful to not let anyone know 
she couldn't read those strange little symbols.  Now she had no chance with 
Tenchi.  He was so smart and so educated.  How could he want someone as 
stupid and ignorant as she was?  It was hopeless.  

She shivered and sniffed.  Life was so unfair.  After all that had happened, 
she only wanted to be happy.  It seemed that Kagato had cursed her from 
beyond the grave.  Everything that he had done to her was lasting beyond its 
initial purpose.  She was doomed to be alone.  She had tried so hard to be a 
part of this strange little earth family, but the truth was that she didn't really 
know how to be part of a family, or even a friend.  She didn't know the 
rules.  None of them liked her anyway.  They just tolerated her.  They would 
be happier if she left.  But where would she go?

She looked up at the interior of the tree house.  It was crude, just a small 
room with no windows.  But the roof was tight and she had a comfortable 
futon and some blankets to curl up in.  Even better, there were the few 
shelves where her most prized possessions were safely displayed.  She had 
learned to hide her things from Kagato early on, as he would destroy any 
belongings she managed to acquire. 

On the shelves were a few pictures of her housemates, a collection of sake 
bottles and cups, and some pretty stones she had found in the river.  Their 
smooth shape soothed her when she moved them into her palms and rotated 
them around.  But most prized was the book Tenchi had given her for 
Christmas last year.  She couldn't read it, but it was something he had given 
to her, and so held great meaning.  She didn't even know what it was about, 
but even more than that she wondered about the inscription Tenchi had 
written on the fronts piece.

Ryoko sniffed.  Maybe she could ask now that they all knew her secret. 
Yeah right.  They would just remember what an ignorant barbarian she was.  
She was reaching for a bottle of sake when a soft knock at the door caught 
her attention.

"Who is it?  Go away!"

Sasami stuck her head in the door.  "It's me!  I've brought you breakfast!"

Ryoko turned her head.  "I'm not hungry."

Sasami sat the basket down and sat on the futon.  "What's wrong, Ryoko?"

Ryoko stiffened.  "Please leave me," she said thickly.

Sasami placed an arm around Ryoko's shoulder.  "I don't leave my friends 
when they are crying."

"I'm not crying," Ryoko snapped, the suppressed tears plain in her speech.

Sasami didn't say anything, but patted Ryoko's shoulder instead.  She let the 
silence coax words from Ryoko.

"I'm your friend?" Ryoko asked in a small voice.

"Of course you are.  Aren't I your friend?"

"Of course you are, " Ryoko said quickly.

"Ryoko, you don't really think we all don't return your friendship do you?"

"Yes, that is exactly what I think," Ryoko said her voice breaking.

"Oh Ryoko!  That's so sad!" Sasami threw both of her arms around Ryoko 
and gave her a big hug.  "And it's not true.  I think of you as another big 
sister!"

"How can you?" Ryoko choked.  "I almost killed you when you were a baby 
remember?  When I attacked Jurai."

"I forgave you Ryoko.  It wasn't you. It was Kagato!"

"But it was through me! I did it." Ryoko took a shuddering breath.  "I did so 
many things."

Sasami scooted over so that she faced Ryoko, and looked her straight in the 
eyes. "Stop blaming yourself!  You had no choice.  It's intention that 
matters."

"I want to believe that Sasami! But I can't!  I can't remember any other way 
of living.  Those memories are all that I have.  They define me."

"Then let Washu give you your old memories back."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I think I used to be a little girl like you once, Sasami.  I don't really 
remember.  I have this feeling, though, that I was sweet and gentle.  That 
girl.she would be ashamed of me."

"Oh Ryoko."

"So don't you see?  That would make me even more ashamed of myself than 
I am even now!"

"But I forgive you, and if you were once like me, don't you think you could 
forgive yourself?"

Ryoko's mouth worked, but she stayed silent.  She didn't have an easy  
rebuttal for that.

Changing the subject so Ryoko wouldn't have to answer that out loud, 
Sasami asked, "But I still don't understand why you can't read.  Didn't you 
need to read to follow Kagato's orders?"

Ryoko laughed bitterly.  "It was just another form of punishment. Because 
he had complete control over me he could even take certain cognitive 
functions away from me."  She reached over to a shelf and picked up the 
book Tenchi had given her and flipped through the pages lovingly.


"I loved to read," she said longingly.  " I can almost remember reading all of 
the time. at some point. in my life.  But when Kagato discovered that, he 
took away my ability to read, and only gave it back during my missions 
when I was too controlled to read for pleasure.  Then he would take it away 
again.  I never got it back the last time."

A tear trickled down Sasami's face.  "Why didn't you tell us?"

"Why do you think?  It's embarrassing."

"But we could have taught you to read again."

"Oh. I never thought of that.  Sasami, I'm not used to having friends."

"I know.  But we can only help you if you ask."

"I don't know how to ask."

"Then get your memories back.  You might remember how."

"I can't decide right now.  I'll think about it, okay?"

"That's a start, I guess."

" Sasami, thank you.  May I be alone now?  I need to think."

"Okay," Sasami said reluctantly.  "Don't forget your food."

"I won't. Bye now."

"Bye, please come home for supper.  I'll make your favorite!"

"Okay, okay!"  Ryoko laughed, gently pushing Sasami to the door.

"Bye!  Don't be late!" Sasami shouted as she and Ryo-Ohki began floating 
downwards.

"Ryoko.." Tenchi whispered as he watched Sasami heading back towards 
the ground.

Sasami looked up at Tenchi as her feet hit the ground.  "I need to tell you 
something about Ryoko," she began as they headed back to the house.  "But 
she is very sensitive about it.  Can you keep a secret?"


Chapter Three

Dinner was quiet and tense as everyone tried not to look at Ryoko's empty 
seat.  The clacks of chopsticks against porcelain bowls broke the silence as 
everyone helped themselves to the sushi and condiments.

Washu was the only exception. Still in her adolescent form, she stared at the 
empty place setting with a haunted look.  She ate mechanically and couldn't 
wait to get back to the sanctuary of her lab.  She had only come out in hopes 
the sushi would attract Ryoko.  But in a way she was glad Ryoko wasn't 
here. What could she say to make it up to her anyway?

Sasami played with her chopsticks as she looked out the window towards the 
lake. It wouldn't be right to start without Ryoko. She brightened when the 
screened door slid open.

In swaggered Ryoko.  Her lips twisted into a smirk and she eyed everyone 
contemptuously.  "My. My. Am I late?"

"Indeed you are," said Ayeka dryly, trying not to seem too friendly.

Ryoko cocked one hip and balanced her weight on the opposite heel.  "Well, 
I just can't be expected to keep appointments.  I'm busy you know. Very, 
very busy."

Sasami looked hurt, but still understood what Ryoko was trying to do.  She 
was sure that Ryoko was very embarrassed about breakfast, and the things 
she had said this afternoon. It was a wonder at all that she had even shown 
up tonight.  Sasami `s eyes twinkled.  Maybe there was hope.

Ryoko still stood looking at the table.  She eyed the sushi longingly, but 
seemed stuck.

Tenchi cleared his throat.  "Ryoko, won't you please join us?"  He motioned 
to the empty place setting next to him.  "See? We saved you a seat."

Ryoko's eyes widened with surprise.  "Why, of course.  Thank you," she 
stammered and quickly made her way to her seat.  She cleared her throat 
nervously, not sure how to react to being invited to join in.  She sank into 
seiza and took her chopsticks.  She looked over to Sasami and noticed that 
she hadn't eaten anything yet.

"Please eat Sasami.  I'm sorry I'm late," she said softly.

"It's okay Ryoko. I understand," Sasami replied gently as Ayeka and Yosho 
looked shocked at the apology.

Ryoko selected several pieces of sushi and quietly mixed an extra large 
helping of wasabi paste into her small bowl of soy sauce.

Tenchi scratched the back of his head nervously.  "Wow!  That's going to be 
hot!"

Ryoko had a tuna roll caught between her chopsticks and held it poised over 
the soy sauce.  "Hmmm?" she asked as she dunked it.

"That's hotter than I could ever eat it."

"Oh, it is?"  She looked embarrassed.  "But you put wasabi paste into your 
soy sauce too," she said as a slight flush crept over her cheeks.

Tenchi laughed quietly.  "Well, sure, but about an eighth of what you put 
in."

Sasami frowned as she saw Ryoko's blush.  "This is Ryoko's favorite dinner 
and she can eat it however she wants!"

Tenchi got the hint, and went back to eating without further comment.

Ryoko sighed and popped the tuna roll into her mouth. She chewed silently 
as she debated whether or not to share a little secret with them.  Sasami said 
they were her friends.  Maybe this would be a good way to start, by sharing 
something that didn't really matter.  If they laughed at her, she would learn 
her lesson before she shared anything really important.  She swallowed and 
took a small drink of tea.

"I do it because..." she trailed off into the silence.

Washu looked up.

"Yes, Ryoko?" Tenchi encouraged.

"I do it because the spices feel nice. I like foods that feel interesting."

"Ryoko, I don't understand.  Please say more," Tenchi said earnestly.

She frowned. " I like sushi because the fish is slick, the rice is soft, and the 
wasabi burns.  I - I think that must be close to tasting it."

"You can't taste food?"  Sasami asked with a little gasp.  "That's awful!"

" I never could, Kiddo.  I guess it was left out of my design."

"Chocolate!" Washu said in a pained voice. 

"Excuse me?" Ryoko asked.

"You could too taste things!  Chocolate was your favorite food!  I couldn't 
keep you out of it!  You used to eat yourself sick!" Washu whined nasally.

"I did?" Ryoko asked in confusion.

The other's stopped eating and watched the pair intensely.

Washu's small fists clutched at the tablecloth.  "Yes you did!  You even held 
up the student commissary to get chocolate pudding."

"And you made me stay up all night diagramming it's molecular structure as 
punishment," Ryoko finished with a distant expression.  "And then you 
made me make it out of basic chemical components for breakfast the next 
morning." Ryoko grimaced and rubbed her temple.

"Exactly," Washu breathed.  "See?! Your memories are still there, still 
locked away!  Please let me in! Please! I want to help you!"  She hopped 
onto the table and ran over to Ryoko.  She knelt and grabbed Ryoko's lapels 
and shook her.  "Don't let that bastard win!  I didn't know you couldn't 
taste!  How cruel!"

Ryoko's mouth hung open as she let Washu shake her.  Washu cared. She 
really cared.  Ryoko found that she cared too, and felt her resolve 
weakening.  She threw her arms around Washu and whispered into her ear: 
"I'm afraid."

Washu stopped shaking her immediately.  "Of what, little Ryoko?" she 
whispered back, wrapping her arms around her daughter protectively.

"Of hating myself even more than I already do," Ryoko said in a broken 
whisper.

"Oh darling," Washu cried as she felt her body shifting back to her adult 
form. She couldn't help it when very strong maternal feelings were aroused 
in her.  "I won't let that happen."

"And I'll be here for you too," Yosho said, putting a firm hand on Ryoko's 
shoulder.

"What?" Ryoko asked pulling back a bit.

"Ryoko, this is the reason I imprisoned you instead of killing you seven 
hundred years ago.  I was waiting for a chance for you to regain your true 
self."

"Yes, imprisoned her in the dark! In misery!" Washu growled, clutching 
Ryoko protectively.

"Don't scold me.  She was warped beyond recognition and completely out of 
control.  Her imprisonment had to be absolute."

Washu glared.  "Even so, you have played a part in her misery, Yosho."

Yosho sighed.  "Yes, I am sorry she fears the dark and small spaces now, but 
I really had no choice. It was that or death."

Washu pointed an accusing finger in Yosho's face.  "Liar!  There were more 
humane ways to contain her.  But you didn't care. She isn't just frightened 
of dark and enclosed spaces!  She is terrified!  Maybe we should see how 
you like the feeling of perpetual drowning in a light-less, watery grave, you 
bastard!"  Her computer materialized beneath her fingertips, even as she 
held Ryoko.

"Hey now!" shouted Tenchi.  This was getting out of control.

"Stop it! Stop it!!" Ryoko sputtered from within Washu's embrace.  She 
squirmed about trying to get free.

Washu's fingers paused, but she said nothing her fury was a silent but 
obvious presence in the room now. She flexed her arms and would not 
release Ryoko.

Unable to get free without hurting Washu, Ryoko stopped struggling, and 
rested her chin on Washu's shoulder. "Look, I've already forgiven him," she 
said with her eyes closed.

"How could you?" Washu whispered.  "Remember our link.  I know just 
how bad it was."

"Forgiving makes me forget.  Then I don't relive it.  Your are making me 
remember again, Washu," Ryoko's voice held a faint tremor of fear. "Those 
are memories I don't desire to reclaim."

Washu banished her computer and gave Yosho a stern look.  "You're off the 
hook because she says so."

Yosho bowed slightly and returned the grave look.  "Then you should be 
proud of your daughter, she is gaining wisdom."

The corners of Washu's eyes crinkled as she caught the implied insult.

"And for the record, I am not afraid of anything!"  Ryoko growled, caring 
less about her so-called wisdom.

Washu's expression shifted with the speed of sliding mercury as she smiled 
down at Ryoko's back.  "Then I guess you're not afraid of your memories 
either! Let's get started!"

"But I haven't finished my dinner!"

"We both know you don't need to eat, if you can taste it or not.  Let's go."

Washu hopped down from the table dragging Ryoko with her.  She was a 
good foot taller than her daughter and had no trouble moving her along.

"But I want to finish!"

"Stop whining!  When we are done, you'll be able to taste it!"  Washu said 
as she took pinched Ryoko's ear to get her to move faster.

"Good luck Ryoko!" Sasami shouted as the two of them disappeared behind 
the lab door.

"Yes, come back to us with more manners!" Ayeka teased helpfully.

"I heard that!" came Ryoko's muffled reply.

Chapter Four


Ryoko fidgeted on a tall stool as Washu shined a pen light into her eyes.

"What are you doing?"

"Looking for something. Ah, there it is! Hold still please," Washu said as 
she reached behind her.  She raised a small device and aimed its aperture at 
Ryoko's eye.  She pushed a button and held steady until a small beep 
sounded.  "All done!"

"What was that?" Ryoko asked blinking here eyes to ease the dryness caused 
by keeping them open so long.

"I just downloaded your memory matrix.  It seemed like a good place to 
start." She plugged the device into a data port on the main computer's 
console.

"Oh," Ryoko drew up her knees and rested her chin on them.

Washu's fingers flew over the keyboard as she stared at her computer 
screen.  "Mmmm."

"What? Did you find anything?"

"Maybe.  There is a little knot in the nexus that shouldn't be there. Hmmm.  
This might be harder than I expected." Washu turned around with a handful 
of electrodes connected to long wires.

"What are those for?"

Washu smiled and gently brushed Ryoko's hair out of the way so the 
Electrodes could come into contact with her skin. "To monitor your brain 
waves.  They will help guide me."

"I thought you had downloaded me already. What do you need this for?"

Washu patted Ryoko's cheek. "That's Kagato talking again.  You are much 
more than a program and you know it.  Any changes that happen in real time 
may give me a clue. Please try to be patient."

Ryoko smiled sheepishly.  "I'll try. may I have my cushion please?"

Washu tapped a button with a wide smile and the teal pillow appeared and 
hovered level with Ryoko's stool.  Ryoko slid onto the cushion, which then 
adjusted itself to the height of Washu's cushion."

"Better?"

"Much." Ryoko felt a tugging in her head as she settled into the cushion. 
something she couldn't quite grasp.

"Something's happening!" Washu shouted as she inspected the data screen. 
"Whatever it is that you are doing. keep doing it!"

Ryoko scrunched her eyes shut and chased after the strange feeling in her 
mind.  The cushion, it had been a birthday present, a party. there had been 
a party.

"Almost got it!"

A lancing pain shot through Ryoko's brain and she cried out, losing her 
grasp on the memory.

"Damn!"  Washu swore as she laid a hand on Ryoko's knee. "Are you 
okay?"

Ryoko rubbed her head, it hurt like hell, but the pain was quickly receding. 
"I'll live. What happened?"

"It seems like Kagato isolated these memories and blocked them out using a 
sensory tie-in system.  Very clever, I must say."

"So I can understand please?"

Washu looked sad again.  She hoped that Ryoko could regain her former 
intellectual capacity and education along with her memories. It really was a 
shame.  "He locked away your happy memories and tied the defense system 
into your pain center. If you get too close it feels like your head is splitting 
in two right?"

"Something like that. And it felt a little like that when I remembered about 
the pudding.  Only this time it was much worse."

"Hmmmm. It probably gets worse with each memory.  This makes it harder 
than I expected.  I'm going to have to research this for a while.  Why don't 
you go out and try to relax."

"Okay. Um. I don't know what to say Washu."

"Then don't. Run along now."

"But...."

"The words will come when we are done.  Now go. I've got much to do if 
we plan to beat this."

Ryoko smiled and laid a hand on Washu's shoulder before she slipped out of 
the lab.  Washu smiled and continued her work.


Tenchi sat reading on the sofa when he heard the lab door open.  He watched 
as Ryoko leaned back against the door and sighed, her shoulders sagging.

"How'd it go?" he asked softly.

She looked over at him and sighed, her chin drooping towards her chest.

"After all of that fuss, we can't get in."

"Washu?"

"She's still working on it.  She sent me out here for awhile." Ryoko rubbed 
her temples.

"Them why not come sit on the couch and relax for awhile?  She'll need you 
for something soon enough."

Ryoko looked back up at him, seeing only his silhouette against the reading 
lamp.  Normally she would have been more than glad to oblige him.  An 
invitation to sit close to him, to be near him was a rare event.  But tonight 
she wasn't very interested in any of that kind of play.  She was too tired.  
She looked up to her rafter and considered just floating up and going to bed.

"Ryoko?"  Tenchi asked, a flavor of worry in his voice.

"Oh. Right." She wearily walked over to him and sat on the far edge of the 
couch.  She snuggled into the corner, facing him, with her arms draped 
across the couch's back.

"Look, I have something to say.  Just let me say it before you answer, 
okay?" Tenchi asked earnestly.

Ryoko nodded, her head still buried in her arms.

The fabric of the couch whispered as Tenchi scooted closer to her.  He laid a 
warm hand on her shoulder and began.  "You are very brave Ryoko.  So 
brave that you hid your fear from us very well. I never knew."

"Knew what?" she asked quietly.

He patted her shoulder.  "Let me finish.  I never understood how much you 
were hurt."

She looked up at him with hard eyes that wavered behind a wall of repressed 
moisture.  "You still don't and I hope you never do."

Tenchi's cheeks flushed with embarrassment, and he removed his hand..  "I 
mean...er. well... the thing is. oh, this isn't coming out right."

Ryoko's mouth twisted into a sad parody of a grin that didn't match her 
eyes.  "It's okay.  It doesn't matter." She was so alone.  Her experience with 
life was so different from this kind boy's.  How could they ever truly 
connect?

Tenchi punched a cushion in frustration.  "It does too matter!  I'm your 
friend, Ryoko."

"I know you try to be.  But I won't really let you, will I?" 

"Why not?" he asked touching her again.  

She shrugged.

"What are you afraid of, Ryoko?"

"Please don't push me. I'm so tired."  Her eyelids fluttered and remained 
half closed as she looked at him.

"I'm sorry."  He paused for a moment, thinking.  "Hey, you used to like to 
read right?"

She nodded drowsily.

"Let me read you a story then," he said getting to his feet.  He walked over 
to a small bookshelf and scanned the titles.

"That sounds nice," she murmured and stretched out on the couch, lying on 
her stomach, her ankles crossed.  

Tenchi eased onto the cushion near her head and opened the book.  "This 
story is called `Treasure Island' and I'm sure you will like it."

He began to read and Ryoko listened happily, enjoying the fanciful tale.  She 
laid on her side with her head snuggled against Tenchi's thigh.  This was 
pure heaven, just like she always had hoped it would be when she hugged 
him.  But unlike those other times he wasn't pushing her away.  This time 
they were connected by the story and the slight contact.  Somehow she had 
done something right.  

What it was that was right didn't matter.  She let the warm feeling of 
happiness lull her into sleep.

Like most good things in her life it didn't last very long.  Soon in her dreams 
she was running down a dark hallway, so consumed by fear that she could 
barely breathe.

...."Mother!  Mother!" she screamed.

She skidded around a corner and dashed up a flight 
of steps. Where was mom?  Why wasn't she 
answering?  Ryoko gasped as her teal dress flashed 
away and was replaced by her red and black 
training suit. Oh, no!

"Help me!" she screamed as she vaulted over a 
landing and started running along another corridor.

"You're losing control Ryoko!  I've almost 
completely hacked into your program," gloated 
Kagato in a calm voice that seemed to come from 
everywhere all at once. 

"No!" shrieked the terrified adolescent as she 
looked about for a place to hide.

While she paused, a hand reached out from a closet 
and quickly drew her inside. "Hush, you little fool 
or he will find us!" Washu whispered harshly.

"Mom!" Ryoko cried with relief.  "I'm so scared. 
What is he doing to me?"

Washu noted the training suit as she drew Ryoko 
into her arms.  "Don't worry, he needs the 
password to get full control over you.  I'll never 
give it to him."

"What are we going to do?"

Washu hesitated. She should have expected this.  
"Little Ryoko, you need to listen.  I need you to 
leave. To run far away, okay honey?"

"What about you?" Ryoko quavered.

"I need to stay here until the authorities come to 
take Kagato away."

"But...."

"I'll come find you as soon as I can," Washu 
promised.

"But how?"

She needed Ryoko to get out of here as soon as 
possible.  Every delay was dangerous.  She tapped 
Ryoko's temple lightly.  "Through our link, silly.  
I'll always be with you.

Ryoko hugged her mother tightly  "Be careful, 
please!"

"I will, now go!  Go to Ryo-Ohki!"

"I love you!" Ryoko whispered as she kissed 
Washu's face and teleported away

Washu drew a deep breath and slowly started 
counting to two thousand, praying with each 
numeral that Ryoko and Ryo-Ohki were speeding 
away to safety.  Outsmarting Kagato shouldn't be 
too difficult as long as Ryoko was out of harms 
way.  Washu consciously shut down her telepathic 
link to her daughter on the odd chance Kagato had 
developed some way of monitoring it.  

Reaching the count of 1789, Washu slipped out of 
the closet and swiftly made her way to Ryoko's 
room.  She needed to be sure that Ryoko hadn't 
left anything dangerous lying out in the open.  That 
silly girl simply didn't have any sense, and the last 
thing Washu needed was for a potential weapon to 
fall into Kagato's hands right now.  Normally a 
hand held atom splitter left out on Ryoko's desk 
wasn't a problem, but tonight wasn't normal.

Washu carefully checked the hallway for any signs 
of her unwanted guest before darting into Ryoko's 
bedroom.  It was a mess as usual, and as usual, 
Ryoko had left her computer on with its network 
connection to Washu's most sensitive files wide 
open.  Washu hissed and ran to the terminal, her 
feet crushing empty snack food containers.  This 
was information Kagato simply must not get 
access to!  As she backed out of the network 
Washu quickly blocked network access from 
Ryoko's computer.  If they both lived through this 
Ryoko was going to be punished for such 
carelessness. Seriously punished.

The computer successfully shut down, Washu 
scanned Ryoko's desk for any other sensitive or 
dangerous items.  She was examining an 
unfamiliar apparatus when she heard the soft 
sound of matter moving by teleportation behind 
her.  Ice running through her veins, she turned 
around to see Ryoko lurching across her bed for a 
stuffed animal.

"Ryoko! What are you doing here?!" Washu 
gasped.

Ryoko flushed, caught in the act. "I forgot Mr. 
Jelly Bean!" she said hugging a battered white 
velour rabbit to her chest.  "I'm leaving, I'm 
leaving!"

Washu's eyes widened as the air around them 
seemed suddenly charged and full of electricity.

"GO! GO NOW!" she shouted.

Ryoko tried, but could only halfway phase out.  
She flickered briefly, before rematerializing in the 
spot she had tried to leave from.

"No, lets all stay together.  One big happy family, 
hmmm?" Kagato asked entering the room from the 
hall.

Washu made as if she were going to run to Ryoko, 
but grunted as she found her feet rooted to the 
floor.  She toppled over, carried along by the 
forward momentum of her lunge.

Shaking his head, Kagato made a slight motion 
with his hand, causing a pulsating red force field to 
surround Washu.  It surrounded her entire body 
except for her head, and clung to her tightly, 
hampering her breathing.

"So you see, Professor, my preliminary 
dissertation data was correct after all."

Ryoko tried to dash behind him and through the 
open door to the hall, but his hand shot out and 
caught her by the throat.  She choked, both of her 
hands pulling at his larger one, as he lifted her feet 
off the floor.

"You should have listened to your mother, 
Ryoko."

"Ryoko!  Use the new sword!  Remember?"  
Washu gasped out.

Ryoko extended her right hand with the fingers 
splayed and a small globe of golden energy formed 
in her hand.  

Smirking, Kagato squeezed her throat harder and 
the energy dissipated.  "That's hard to do with out 
oxygen, eh little one?" he chuckled.

He turned his gaze to Washu.  "The password.  
Now."

"Never." Washu's eyes took on a fierce glint as 
they narrowed into thin slits.  "I'll never tell."  She 
could barely whisper the last word as the force 
field's pressure became even stronger.

Ryoko was now hanging limply from Kagato's 
grasp, and he shifted his hold on her so he was 
carrying her in his arms.  "You are going to die 
anyway Washu, and if you die before you tell me 
the pass word, so will Ryoko die."

With that, he lifted Ryoko high above his head and 
slammed her down upon his right knee, breaking 
her back in one quick motion.  Ryoko grunted, 
blood spraying from her mouth.

Kagato threw her to the ground where she lay 
abnormally twisted.

"No!" gasped Washu.

"What will it be for her Washu? Death or life?"

Washu sobbed with the little breath she had.  She 
could see the life fading from Ryoko's eyes.

"The password Washu.  It's the only way I can 
access her system to repair this kind of 
catastrophic damage."

Washu clenched her eyes tightly.  She just couldn't 
let Ryoko die.  If she lived there would always be a 
chance she could escape Kagato's control.  There 
would be no escape from death.

"It's `Jelly Bean', you bastard."

"Ah, so you can be reasonable. Good."  Kagato 
summoned his own ephemeral portable computer 
and typed in the password.  With a few more 
keystrokes he had stabilized Ryoko's condition.  
Mostly.

"Well, it's a good thing I know so much about it's 
design, professor.  It makes this creation easier to 
repair."

Ryoko moaned pitifully, blood still seeping out of 
her mouth into a small congealing puddle under 
her chin.

"You didn't finish! Help her!" Washu wheezed 
angrily.

"Oh, it'll live.  But I always thought that the ability 
to feel pain was the biggest of its many defects.  I 
want it to learn from pain.  Let's see how fast that 
fantastic body can find a way to bypass pain.  If it 
can."

Washu let out an inarticulate cry of anguish.

"In fact, I think I'll let you watch after all."  
Kagato said as he left the room.

Washu felt the pressure on her body lesson to the 
point that she was only restrained, not in danger of 
asphyxiating.  "Ryoko? Sweetheart?  Can you hear 
me?"

The young girl groaned and feebly opened her 
eyes.  "Momma?"

.... "Momma?  Momma?  Please help me?"  Ryoko muttered as she thrashed 
in her sleep, coming out of her remembering dream.

A cool cloth gently wiped her brow.  "It's okay.  I'm here now."

Ryoko opened her eyes and cast a haunted gaze up at an adult sized Washu.  
"I remembered."

Washu ran a shaking hand along Ryoko's cheek.  "I know. I think we shared 
the memory through our link just now."

Ryoko closed her eyes again. "I remembered.  I really remembered."

She pushed up to one elbow and threw her arms around Washu who was 
sitting next to her on the couch.  "It's all my fault.  If I'd only done what you 
said!"

Washu closed the embrace.  "Hush little one.  You were a child.  You were 
scared."

Ryoko closed her eyes.  "Was that really me?  I - she  - I was so .?"

"Innocent? Yes." Washu murmured sadly.

A deep sob welled up out the depth of Ryoko's being, and she could not stop 
it. Instead she clutched at her mother more tightly.  To cover, she wailed, "I 
risked everything for a stupid stuffed rabbit?"

Washu chuckled.  "Not just any stuffed rabbit.  That was Mr. Jelly Bean.  
You had him ever since before you were allowed out of the birthing 
chamber.  He was your security blanket."

"Oh." Ryoko said softly, beginning to understand, faintly, how her past self 
might have felt about that.

Washu reached out and into the air behind Ryoko's head and drew 
something out of pseudo space  "Here."

Ryoko looked at the white stuffed rabbit.  "Is that really.?"  Then she 
noticed the rust colour of old blood stains on its left paw. "Oh. It is."  She 
made no move to take it.

Washu noticed the path of Ryoko's glance.  "Yes.  That is a stain from that 
night."

Ryoko stared at the rabbit as if in a trance.

"Don't you want him?"  Washu asked, her voice leaden.  She had been 
saving him for so long.

Ryoko started to reach for the bunny, then stopped and looked around 
furtively.

"There is no one here but us.  It's late at night everyone else went to sleep," 
she said in a firm voice and tired not to look at the delegation of concerned 
housemates that hovered just around a corner.  The breaking of the locks on 
Ryoko's memory had caused such a sharp counter flow of energy, that the 
equipment  had sent out a psychic pulse and  broadcast the memory  to every 
member of the household.  Ryoko didn't need the burden of that knowledge 
right now.

Ryoko bit her lip and reached for the toy.  It felt achingly familiar to grasp 
the soft animal in her hands like that, and soon she was hugging it tightly, 
her memories of it clarifying with the contact. She sniffed, fresh tears 
pooling under her eyes.

Washu trembled with hope at this sight.  "That's enough for one night.  I 
think we've broken through.  Tomorrow will be a busy day.  We should 
sleep."

Washu stood and cracked her back.  She could definitely tell the difference 
in her center of gravity after being so short for so long.  "Good night, 
Ryoko." She started towards her lab.

"Washu. Wait."

Washu stopped but didn't turn around.

"I don't want to go back to sleep.  I don't want to have another dream like 
that."

"We will find some happy memories tomorrow. It will get better." Washu 
said starting to walk again."

"No.  I mean... I'm... I don't..."

Washu paused and turned around. "Yes?"

Ryoko hung her head.  "I'm scared.  Please don't go."

Washu walked back over to Ryoko, but kept her distance. Something 
important was happening here.  She was on the knife-edge, wanting to help 
Ryoko, but also aware that the wrong move would drive Ryoko away again.

"I'm here.  What do you want?

Ryoko grimaced.  "It sounds stupid."

"That wouldn't be a first," Washu said with a wry twist of her lips.

Ryoko chuckled darkly.  "I guess not.  Could I sleep with you?"

Washu started.  "Sleep with me?"

"Yeah. you know. Slumber party."

Washu was touched. Ryoko wanted her protection.  "Sure, but the moment 
you start to snore you're out. Got it?"  They started walking towards the lab.

"Fine. Just don't tell anybody about this. Any of this."  Ryoko said, going 
ahead of Washu into he lab.

"My lips are sealed," Washu said as she turned around and gave their silent 
observers a dark look.  If they ruined this for her, there would be hell to pay.


Chapter Five


Silence was thick and persistent, yet it felt like morning.  What time was it?  
Ryoko, cracked open an eye.  The light was unnaturally dim, given the 
signals her body was sending her about the time.  Yet it was so warm and 
comfortable, why move?  She snuggled deeper into her blankets.

Wait a minute.  This wasn't her bed.

Ryoko sat up and noticed she was still in her clothes.  That was odd.  She 
was in an unfamiliar futon, and this room didn't look at all familiar.  It was 
in fact, much nicer than any room in the Masaki house she had ever seen.  
Even in the dim light she could see the rich wood paneling and heavy 
carpets.  Her pirate's eyes noted that the art on the walls was the real deal 
and quite expensive.  The other items in the room, loaded bookshelves and 
reading couches, spoke of an intellectual owner.  This must be Washu's 
bedroom.  That's right. She had slept here last night.  Ryoko noticed a 
fantastic bed in a recessed corner.  It's canopies and feather beds were 
worthy of a queen.  Not to mention it was a rumpled mess. Yup, that fit 
Washu.  It was empty though.  Ryoko wondered where Washu had gone.

Ryoko pushed back the covers and noticed Mr. Jelly Bean beneath.  She  
regarded it somberly, having difficulty believing that she had ever cared so 
strongly about a toy.  That didn't fit. Not at all.

Anger flashed through her.  Why should she care  what this forgotten child 
had felt about anything?  This child was dead. Dead and long gone.  Seeing 
her story wasn't going to resurrect her.  Ryoko grabbed the stuffed rabbit 
and charged her hands with energy, planning to incinerate the damned thing.

But she couldn't.  Her fanged sneer slipped into an expression of wounded 
confusion.  Somewhere, buried very deeply, a small voice within her begged 
her not to do it.  Most frightening of all, it was her voice. She recognized it 
as her own.  

Ryoko numbly set the toy back on the bed.  This might change everything. It 
might change her.  She had fought so hard to survive. She had earned the 
right to be bitter, selfish and self-centered.  She liked being tough and 
brazen.  No matter what everyone else thought of her, she didn't want to be 
erased so another version of her could take over. A single tear crept out of 
Ryoko's left eye.  It felt like she was dying.

A door opened, spilling golden sunlight into the room. An adult Washu 
stood in the door shaking her head.

"It won't be like that."

Ryoko hurriedly wiped her tear away.  "How would you know?" she asked 
crossly.

"Because I know you. Both `yous' if you will."

"Yeah, right. You just want to get rid of me."

Washu padded over and sat on the corner of the futon.  "Nope.  I just happen 
to know it doesn't work that way. And I also know that you aren't as off 
track as you think."

"Meaning?"

Washu surprised Ryoko by gently taking her chin and tilting Ryoko's face 
down so her eyes met Washu's.  "Meaning, that my Little Ryoko is still here 
right in front of me.  She didn't die, she didn't go away.  She just has these 
huge gaping holes in her life."

"Me? But who am I? Who was I supposed to be?" Ryoko asked feeling ill.  

Washu smirked with love.  "You were supposed to be who you are. A mix of 
your past and your present.  But until you unlock your past, you are only half 
of your true self."

"I...I.."

"Listen Ryoko. Connecting with your past will only change you, not destroy 
you.  It will be a melding, each part complimenting the other, not 
overwhelming."

"Zero overwhelmed me," Ryoko grumbled.

Washu let go of Ryoko's chin.  "Just for a little while.  Listen, I've been 
working all morning to set up a sort of slide show for everyone.  Some of 
your happy memories.  I thought it would be a nice way to start, with your 
close friends near you for support..  

"I'd prefer to keep it private."

"I figured you'd say that.  But keep in mind, this is the perfect way for you 
to open up to them. Without saying a word."

"Hmmmm."  Ryoko considered.  That certainly was a plus.  They all talked 
too much anyway.

"Well, think about it.  It's time for breakfast.  We don't want to keep Sasami 
waiting."

"Right," Ryoko said as she ran a hand through her hair wondering if she 
looked neat enough to face Tenchi.

"You look fine! " Let's go!"  Washu shouted, offering Ryoko her hand.

Ryoko smiled softly and grabbed Washu's hand, teleporting them to the 
dining room.

"Wheee! That's fun!" Washu shouted as she skipped to take her seat, not 
noticing how strange her usual childish patter sounded coming from her 
adult form.

Smirking, Ryoko settled in and took a quick look around at the sober faces 
of those around her.

"What?" she asked suspiciously, her smirk shifting into a distrustful frown..

Ayeka would not meet Ryoko's eyes and hung her head in shame.  "Oh 
Ryoko. I'm so sorry. I had no idea."

"About what?" Ryoko asked dangerously.

Tenchi looked her straight in the eye.  "About how you were stolen from 
Washu."

Yosho grunted in agreement. "And how innocent you were.  I had no idea 
myself. And now I feel regret."

Washu sniffed at Yosho.  "As you should."

Ryoko closed her eyes in mortification. "Washu!  I asked you not to tell!" 
she growled. "How could you?"

"She didn't," Ayeka said earnestly.

This stopped Ryoko's anger.  Ayeka might be petty, but she rarely outright 
lied. Ryoko opened her eyes and looked hopelessly around the group.  Now 
they knew how weak she had been.  "Then how?"

Yosho took a drink of tea and contrived to look the part of the mysterious 
shrine keeper "I believe Tsunami may have had something to do with it.  I 
felt an other worldly presence last night when your memory was shared with 
us."

"What a load of crap!" Washu snorted.  It was unexpected side effect, but I 
believe that the force of the memory locks breaking over-loaded my 
monitors and caused a discharge of psychic energy."

Everyone looked at her blankly.

"What I'm trying to say is that my machine short circuited and sent you into 
Ryoko's dream!" Washu rephrased her voice high pitched with impatience.

"That's just great Washu!  I don't like this at all!  What if it happens again?" 
Ryoko ranted pulling at her hair.

"It won't need to happen again.  Last night happened because I broke 
through the locks placed on your memories and the resulting over flow of 
energy."

"My memories are back?"

"Yes.  Ready for that slide show?"

"Slide show?" asked Tenchi with interest.

Ryoko glared at Washu.  Now that it was out in the open, it would be very 
difficult to get everyone off of her back about it, and she still hadn't decided 
if she wanted to share.

"Oh, it's nothing,' she lied grinding her teeth.

"It certainly looks like more than nothing," Ayeka cooed, with a superior 
grin.

"A slide show, eh?" asked Yosho.  "Do you have photographs of Ryoko's 
youth Washu?"

"Better!" shouted Washu.  " I invented a special machine that will allow me 
to project a selection of my and Ryoko's memories on a movie screen."

"Ohhhh!" they all murmured.

"Can we watch it now? Oh please?" breathed Sasami with excitement.   "I 
bet Ryoko was very cute when she was little!"

Ryoko grunted.  "Forget it.  These memories are mine!  And besides, I 
haven't had any breakfast yet."

"Oh, I wouldn't ask you to go through such an ordeal with out your 
breakfast," Washu agreed tenderly.

Ryoko arched a suspicious eyebrow.  "What are you up to, Washu?"

"Sasami dear," Washu continued, "do you have any breakfast left for 
Ryoko?"

"Oh yes!" Sasami giggled and bounded into the kitchen.

"Hey, what's up?" Ryoko crabbed alternating her glances between Washu 
and the kitchen.

Washu only folded her hands and smiled.

"Here ya go, Ryoko!" Sasami said gaily as she set a large slice of chocolate 
cake with chocolate icing and a glass of cold milk before the stunned space 
pirate.

"Is this a trick?" Ryoko growled.  "Don't think that you... you..." she broke 
off as she sniffed deeply.  Her eyes widened and she looked at Washu, a  
question in your eyes.

"Eat your breakfast, little Ryoko!" Washu said happily, smiling even more 
broadly.

Ryoko tore her eyes from Washu's and slowly picked up her fork.  She 
carefully dug into the slice, the moist cake yielding easily to the metal.  She 
speared a bite on the fork's tines and slowly raised it to her lips, her nose 
twitching, and her eyes almost crossing.  She gently brought the forkful of 
cake into her mouth, and her eyes closed as she laid the empty fork upon the 
table.

"Ohhhh," she moaned softly, chewing deliberately.  "Oh my."

Washu glowed.  "Guess what else I fixed last night?"

Ryoko opened her eyes with out really seeing.  Her expression told everyone 
that she was lost in this new sensation.  "This tastes wonderful."  She took 
up her fork again and devoured the rest of the cake in three bites.

"Only Ryoko would have cake for breakfast," Ayeka said fondly, enjoying 
the innocent joy Ryoko was finding in the flavor of chocolate. She smiled 
shyly, truly regretting her past behavior towards Ryoko.

Ryoko caught the sentiment, but rolled her eyes for appearances as she used 
her fingertips to blot up any crumbs she may have missed.

Sasami grinned happily.  "Would you like some more, Ryoko?"

Ryoko removed her fingers from her mouth.  "May I?" she asked excitedly.

This use of pretty manners caused the others to stop and stare.

"Of course!" Sasami laughed. "Would you like a small or large slice?" she 
asked generously.

"I want the whole cake," Ryoko crowed.

The others chuckled and unfroze.  Something's would never change, and 
somehow that was as comforting to them as it was to Ryoko.

Twinkling, Sasami hurried off to fulfil Ryoko's request.

"Well then Ryoko, Since you are so busy rediscovering your taste buds, do 
you mind if the rest of us watch the little slide show I spent all night 
preparing?"

Now up to her elbows in the cake, Ryoko paused briefly to nod, before 
losing herself in gustatory pleasure.

"That was a sneaky trick Miss. Washu," Tenchi chided gently.

"What's sneaky about it? I gave her back the use of a whole set of senses.  It 
was down right altruistic."

Tenchi shook his head and decided not to press it further because he wanted 
to see the slide show too.

Washu used a hand held remote to dim the lights and activate a digital 
screen that hovered just beyond the table.  She cleared her throat.

"I thought it might be best to begin with one of my memories," she said.


Washu pressed a button and the screen flared a bright white momentarily 
and then resolved to an image of an adult Washu working in a high-tech 
laboratory.  This Washu hummed softly as she made some adjustments to a 
computer program.

...."Sugar and spice, and everything nice. and a 
dash of hot sauce.that's what little Ryokos are 
made of," she murmured with a trace of dry 
humor.  She walked over to a large window and 
looked inside.  Sleeping peacefully in an 
institutional crib was a blue haired toddler with 
many wires and electrodes attached to her body.  
Besides that, she looked like a typical child 
snuggled under a blanket and cuddling a stuffed 
bunny.

Washu placed a hand on the glass and spoke softly.  
"You are almost ready to emerge little one.  As 
soon as I can control your energy fluctuations, you 
can be with your mommy."

The child opened two bright yellow eyes and 
observed Washu somberly and Washu felt an 
inarticulate feeling of questioning flowing through 
their mental link.

Washu smiled and sent a pulse of love down the 
link along with her feelings of fierce 
protectiveness.

The little girl smiled and stuck a thumb in her 
mouth.

Washu grinned back and began making silly faces.

The child laughed and hid under the blanket, then 
popped out again.

Washu responded by hiding her face in her hands 
and then exposing it again. "Peek-a-boo!"

Little Ryoko squealed and laughed again.

"Yes, you are my perfect little daughter.  I can't 
wait to hold you."

Understanding the intent if not the words, Ryoko 
held out her arms.

"No, no, little one. Not yet.  Soon.  I promise," 
Washu said wistfully now pressing both of her 
hands against the glass.

Ryoko dropped her arms and curled up under her 
blanket, again watching Washu somberly.

Washu sighed and activated a telemonitor within 
Ryoko's chamber and programmed some 
intellectually stimulating material appropriate for 
the child's cognitive development.  She needed to 
get back to work so she could finish up the last few 
stages as soon as possible.

....The screen flashed white again and remained blank. For a moment, no one 
spoke.  Of all of the imagined scenarios of Ryoko's creation, no one had 
ever expected such tenderness.  They waited for Ryoko's reaction.

However, Ryoko was too stunned to speak.  She busied her self with licking 
her plate as she tried to process this new information.  Kagato had claimed 
that he had been her creator.  And even though Washu had told her 
otherwise, she hadn't believed it in her heart.  It seemed more fitting that a 
creature such as she was made by another monster.  But now she had seen 
the truth.  She set the plate down and looked at Washu, her eyes begging for 
more.

Washu's lips trembled as she saw the longing in her daughter's eyes.  "You 
see? You were a labor of love.  My child from the start." 

Ryoko trembled and looked away.  What could she say to that?   Distracted 
by this flood of emotions and the overwhelming flavor of chocolate, Ryoko 
tried to think as she attempted to get her tongue to reach a smear of 
chocolate right above the corner of her mouth. "That was me?" she asked 
finally.

"Yes," Washu said simply.

"Then why can't I remember any of that?" Ryoko asked suspiciously. What 
if this was just a dirty trick?

Washu laughed.  "Because you were just a baby!  Babies don't remember 
things because their little brains aren't developed enough to store that kind 
of information."

"A baby," Ryoko repeated blankly.

"A CUTE baby," Washu clarified in a childish voice.

"Ugh!  Ryoko exclaimed, an embarrassed flush dotting her cheeks.

"Would you like to access some of your own memories now?" Washu asked, 
wisely changing the subject.

Ryoko flushed even more.  "Could I see just one more of yours first?" she 
asked shyly, completely forgetting the presence of the others.

Washu's heart soared at Ryoko's new interest in her past.  "Of course." She 
pointed the remote and accessed another memory.

....Again the screen flashed, this time resolving into 
the scene of a chaotic child care center.  A harried 
teacher was talking to Washu and gesturing wildly.  
Washu had obviously hurried from her lab, as she 
still had a protective white smock over her clothing 
and had safety glasses perched atop her head.  She 
listened to the teacher and shook her head in 
embarrassment.  Across the room a six year old 
Ryoko was standing stark naked, except for her 
pink boots, on top of her little desk.  Her ponytail 
had come undone and her silvery green hair stuck 
out at wild, tangled angles.  She was holding court 
over an awed group of classmates.

She pointed imperiously at them.  "I am Queen 
Ryoko. And I say you must take your clothes off 
too!"

The other children giggled and began to disrobe, 
much to the dismay of the teacher.

Washu hurried over and gathered Ryoko up under 
one arm.

"Ryoko!  Where are your clothes?" she snapped.

"I threw them out the window," Ryoko replied 
calmly looking around Washu's elbow.

"Well, you just interrupted an important 
experiment. The whole thing is ruined."

"I'm sorry," Ryoko said in a voice that proved she 
wasn't.

Washu grimaced.  "You know I can tell when you 
are lying, so drop it."

Ryoko frowned. She hated that.

Washu apologized once again to the teacher and 
carried her daughter out of the room and towards 
her office at the Academy.  

"How many times have I told you to keep your 
clothing on?" Washu asked as she hurried down the 
hall.

"How many times have I told you that I don't like 
clothes?" Ryoko replied tartly imitating her 
mother's voice.  "They itch!"

"There is nothing wrong with your skin sensors.  
Though I can't say the same for your modesty 
pathways," Washu grumbled ignoring the amused 
glances of her colleagues as they made their way 
down the hall.

Ryoko was waving happily to the professors she 
knew, enjoying the attention.  "Hi Dr. Vilella!" she 
called, seeing one of her favorites, who almost 
always had candy in his pockets.

A grey haired man in a formal suit walked up and 
winked at her. "Good morning Ryoko, Dr. Hakubi."

"Good morning," said Washu her annoyance plain 
in her voice.

"Kicked out of  daycare again?" he asked kindly 
handing Ryoko a strawberry lollipop.  Ryoko 
wasted no time in unwrapping it.

"Mmm-hmm!" she slurprd happily.

Washu deftly removed the sucker from Ryoko's 
mouth.  "No suckers for naughty little girls!"

"Mom!"

Washu returned her attention to Dr. Vilella. "That's 
seven times she's been kicked out this month," she 
said with exasperation.

"Well if you want to know, I think her dress is 
flying at the top of the flag pole as we speak," Dr. 
Vilella chuckled.

"Little Ryoko! You told me that you threw them 
out of the window!" Washu said sternly.

"Well, that was the first step," Ryoko explained.

Washu rolled her eyes, itching to get to the relative 
privacy of her office. It seemed Ryoko was learning 
how `not-quite-lies' could escape mental detection.  
This could be a big problem.

"So how is your research on dimensional pockets 
going?" Dr. Vilella asked not really caring about 
Ryoko's state of undress.

Washu brightened and stuck the lollipop in her 
mouth.  "That gives me an idea!"  She opened a 
dimensional pocket and tossed a surprised Ryoko 
inside.  Washu leaned forwards and filled the 
pocket's opening with her face.  "You have some 
clothing in there with you.  You may not come out 
until you are dressed young lady!"

....The memory ended, leaving the screen blank.  Everyone, including Ryoko 
had laughed so hard that their sides ached terribly.

"Oh my goodness!" giggled Ayeka.  " Some things never change."

Tenchi was laughing, but still blushed a bright red at the nudity, mostly 
because it made him remember just how much Ryoko had grown up.

"That was me!" Ryoko said proudly.  "It fits!" She felt a warm glow inside.  
The things about her self that she always took for granted were part of a long 
history.  She felt more real.  More grounded in human experience.

"I told you ," Washu said gently.  " Are you ready for a memory of your 
own now?"

Ryoko took a deep breath.  "Yes."

"Good.  When I unlocked them, they were sorted by priority.  I randomly 
selected one of the highest.  I don't even know what it is.  Are you ready?  I 
can't wait."

Ryoko nodded and took the remote from her mother. She pressed play and 
anxiously awaited one of her very own childhood memories.

....This time the scene was in what appeared to be 
Ryoko's childhood bedroom.  The walls were 
painted in a vivid blue and sported pictures of 
different animals and mythical creatures.  Galactic 
models hung down on wires from the ceiling, and 
skeletal models of various creatures graced the 
tops of overstuffed bookshelves.  The room was 
mostly cast in deep shadows, with the pale purple 
light of a nightlight plugged into the far wall 
glowing reassuringly.

Brightly illuminated by a bedside lamp Ryoko, 
appearing to be nine or so, was snuggled deep 
under the covers with her head propped up on 
plump pillows.  Mr. Jelly Bean's head was tightly 
pressed under her chin.  Sitting on the side of the 
bed was Washu reading a story out-loud from a 
gilt-edged book.

"So you see, Sleeping Beauty woke up when the 
prince gave her the kiss of true love.  That is 
stronger than any spell or curse, except one that I 
might cast of course! The end." Washu said 
closing the book.


Ryoko sighed.  "Will I fall in love someday?" she 
asked looking up at her mother.

Washu leaned over and smoothed back a stray lock 
of Ryoko's hair.  "Of course you will, honey."

"Really?" Ryoko said with a surprising wistfulness 
lacing her voice.

"Why do you ask?"

Ryoko looked away.  "Never mind. It's stupid."

"You can tell me anything, you know that right?" 
Washu asked gently.

"Yeah. It's just."

"Yes?"

"This boy that I like doesn't like me back."

A shadow briefly passed over Washu's face.  
"That happens too, I'm afraid. Sometimes two 
people don't feel the same way about each other."

Ryoko looked back at her mother, with urgent 
eyes.  "No! Its more than that."  She paused, the 
real hurt in her eyes tearing at Washu's heart.

"He told me. he said." Ryoko struggled for 
words.

Washu took Ryoko's hand and squeezed it softly.  
"Go on."

Ryoko looked away again in apparent shame.  She 
took her free hand and drew the covers over her 
head.  "He said that I wasn't real.  That boys didn't 
kiss robots," she said in a small voice that was 
further muffled by the blankets.

"He said what?!" Washu shouted furiously, 
whipping the covers away from Ryoko's face.  In 
one quick movement she gathered Ryoko in her 
arms and hugged her with maternal fierceness.

Ryoko hugged back and continued.  "He said they 
all knew the truth about me.  And that no one 
would ever kiss me."

Washu's face, hidden behind Ryoko was a mask of 
fury.  How dare those little substandard herd stock 
mock her daughter?  She started counting to get 
her temper under control.  She was the director of 
the Academy and she rarely used her power for 
personal gain.  Well, this time would be an 
exception.  Those children were only repeating 
what they had heard their parents say and those 
parents were going to find sitting difficult when 
she was through with them.

"Mommy? Is it true? You haven't said anything? 
Does that mean he was right?" Ryoko quavered.

Washu squeezed harder. "No way! He was a little 
fool!" She relaxed her hold and slowly pushed 
Ryoko away and looked her straight in the eye.

"You already know how you were born.  I've 
never lied to you. Ever.  Do you remember what 
else I've told you about your birth?"

"That you wanted a little girl more than the moon," 
Ryoko recited.

"Exactly.  I wanted you more than I want to be a 
scientist or even breathe.  So I made you out of 
me, and other important things. I made you into 
the most perfect little person there ever was."

Ryoko sniffed and her eyes looked glassy.  
"Really?" she begged for reassurance.

"Absolutely.  You re a person not a robot.  Robots 
don't have hearts and souls like we do.  Someone 
will love you someday.  I already love you now."

Reluctant to cry in front of her mother now that 
she was older, Ryoko buried her head in Washu's 
shoulder and breathed shakily trying to get things 
under control.  " I love you too, mom."

Washu patted her back.  "Don't listen to them, 
people are jealous of how wonderful you are.  You 
are so smart, and beautiful, and talented.  That's 
enough to make anyone green with envy."

"And I can teleport, " Ryoko added proudly.

Washu chuckled.  "See how clever you are?  You 
shouldn't have figured that one out `til you were 
older."

Ryoko giggled and surreptitiously wiped her tears 
on Washu's shirt before she settled back into bed.

"Feeling better now?" Washu asked, already 
mentally listing the names who would be 
summoned to her office the next morning."

Ryoko nodded, then considered, "Well, I would 
feel even better if I had a pony," she wheedled.

"You're better." Washu stated with a wry smile.  
She got to her feet.  "Sweet dreams Little Ryoko."

"Mom! I'm too old to be called that."

Washu turned off the bedside lamp.  "You'll never 
be too old to be my little Ryoko." She blew Ryoko 
a kiss and left the room closing the door softly 
behind her.


....The screen went blank again, and the group was silent.  Where the last 
memory had been hilarious this one had been touching and sweet.  They all 
basked in the strong bond between mother and child they had  witnessed.  
Especially Ryoko.  Her eyes were wide and she was massaging her temple 
as if her head hurt her.

"Mom?" she asked uncertainly.

Washu summoned her laptop, so worried that she didn't notice Ryoko's use 
of that magic word.  "What? Did that hurt? The lock must have re-engaged. 
Hold on while I."

"Not that," Ryoko interrupted.  "Mom, how could have I forgotten that? You 
love me.  How could I forget that? And where are the rest of my memories?  
Why can't I remember more?" Tears were streaking down her cheeks and 
her shallow breathing heralded hyperventilation

Washu leaned through her holo-computer and took Ryoko into her arms, 
very much like she had done in the memory.  "Shush, shush.  You forgot 
because you were forced too.  And I am controlling your access rate.  I don't 
want you over loaded.  See what just one has done to you?  We need to 
move slowly."

Tenchi made a slight movement as if he wanted to go to Ryoko's side, but 
Yosho put a hand on Tenchi's shoulder and shook his head slightly.  
Sighing, Tenchi settled back into his seat

"But you love me, " Ryoko sobbed.  "I didn't get it before. And now I do!  
And you thought I was smart, and beautiful.  No one has ever thought that 
about me before."

Ayeka winced regretting every time she had mocked Ryoko's appearance or 
refinement.  If she had known the bruises that had hid themselves under her 
friend's skin she would have never had taunted her so.

Washu stroked Ryoko's hair.  "I still think those things."

"But Kagato told me I was waste. A mistake."

"Yes, and I heard every cruel word through our link, and felt them 
destroying your heart.  Damn him," Washu growled.

::But now, just now, I feel kind of special,:: Ryoko said shyly through their 
link, her sobs quieting.

Washu pulled back and wiped away the tears on Ryoko's cheek.  "That's 
because you are remembering the truth.  And did you see those little pieces 
of yourself that survived everything you have been through?"

Ryoko chuckled wetly.  "The clothes, or rather the lack of them."

Washu arched an eyebrow.  "Now don't tell me you missed your little 
attitudes and your bent towards manipulation?"

"I saw them," Ryoko whispered.

"As did I," Ayeka whispered behind her hand to an amused Sasami.

"So that person you are feeling fondness for is really yourself.  You can 
recognize that, right?" Washu asked Ryoko.

"Yes, Yes I can," Ryoko said in disbelief. "I really can."

"Are you ready for another memory?"

Ryoko closed her eyes and shook her head.  "Not tonight." She wrapped her 
arms around her waist and hugged herself.  "This feels so good. I don't want 
to waste it."

Sasami made a disappointed sound.  "Awwww! But we were just getting to 
know you better!"

Eyes still closed, Ryoko allowed her lips to twist into a little smirk.  
"Exactly.  And while I have appreciated the moral support tonight, this stuff 
is really too private to share."

"So you are done for tonight?' Washu verified.

"Yes, maybe we can do this again in your lab tomorrow?"

Washu glowed at the use of `we'.  "Of course we can." She began typing on 
her laptop.  "Just give me a second to shut things down."

"Wait.  Can you return my ability to read first?"

Washu's smile faded into a straight line and she hung her head.  She had 
hoped Ryoko would not ask about this right away.

"I'm afraid I can't.  It seem s like Kagato put a defensive lock there, and 
there was major damage done to your neural connections when we broke 
through."

Ryoko's left fang worried her lip as she looked away.  "I see." Her earlier 
happiness was visibly draining away from her.

"I may still be able to fix it, but I don't know yet.  I need more time."

Ryoko sighed, and kicked off the floor and drifted towards the stairs.  "Well, 
what's a few more days after 700 years, right?" she tried to quip, her attempt 
at humor falling horribly flat.

Yosho stood suddenly and took a firm hold on Ryoko's wrist and stopped 
her from drifting away.

Surprisingly, she allowed him to do so and blinked at him, her eyes slightly 
unfocused.

"Ryoko-chan.  You must not go.  You are closer to us right now than you 
have ever been.  Don't shut us out."

She hovered in the air, taking in his words.

"Let us be your family, let us help you."

"I'm so tired," she protested with a wide yawn.

"That's because you've had a hard day," he said patiently, as if he was 
talking to a small child.   

She nodded sleepily, obviously becoming more drowsy by the second.  
"Wha- what's happening to me?" she asked, her head lolling forward.

Yosho pulled her gently to him and gathered her up in his arms.  "It's time 
for bed, I think." He shot Washu a concerned look.

Washu's brow crinkled as she watched Ryoko doze off.  "This must be a 
side effect of reactivating that part of her neural net."  She consulted her 
laptop.  "Her melatonin levels are off the charts. Not to mention. that can't 
be right.oh my!"

She looked up to watch Ryoko's form shrinking in size, mass, and 
proportion, until it reached the shape of the nine year old child she had been 
in the last memory. Her now too large clothing draped loosely around her 
diminutive body.

Washu frowned.  "Damn that Kagato.  This was a clever fail safe to control 
her if she ever got her memories back.  It not only knocks her out, it morphs 
her form to match her physical development in the memory, making her 
easier to control!"

"Did this happen last night when she got her first major memory back?" 
asked Yosho as he  adjusted Ryoko in his arms, giving her neck more 
support.

"No.." Washu thought for a moment.  "But I'm guessing this defense was set 
to activate only if the amount of recall reached a certain threshold.  It would 
have been too time consuming for Kagato  to reset her every time a small 
memory asserted itself."

"And she remembered a lot today," Sasami observed.

Washu closed her eyes as emotions washed over her.  "She remembered 
enough to know her inner-self.  And once again he hurt her."

"Can you fix it Washu?" Tenchi asked nervously, worried for his friend.

"Should you fix it?"  asked Yosho with grave seriousness.  "This could be 
her second chance for a childhood."

Washu nodded and opened her eyes.  "That thought crossed my mind.  
However, to do so I would have to lock away or destroy her memories after 
this age.  Not only would that make me as bad as Kagato, I know in my heart 
that our Ryoko would never want that."

Yosho nodded and passed the sleeping child into Washu's arms.  "So what 
are you going to do?"

Washu cast a tender glance at Ryoko and started walking towards her lab.  
"First I'll tuck her in, then get to work on restoring her body as well as her 
ability to read," she said in her typical `greatest-scientific-genius-in-the-
universe' voice.

She paused and turned to face them all once more.  " I hope you all now 
realize just how much my daughter has lost and will treat her more kindly," 
she said more seriously.

"Of course, Miss. Washu," Ayeka said meekly.


Sasami smiled and met Washu's eyes. They both knew she had never 
excluded Ryoko in the first place.

 "I understand her better now," Tenchi acknowledged.  " I will do my best to 
help her," he promised.

Washu nodded curtly.  "Then I thank you."  She disappeared under the stairs 
with Ryoko, kicking the door shut behind her with her foot.

Epilogue

Still physically nine, but with all of her memories back, Ryoko strained to 
help hang up the laundry on an outside line she could barely reach.

"Thank you, little Ryoko," Ayeka said with a kind chuckle, passing her a 
clothespin.

"Oh can it!" Ryoko groused, but with a smile.  " I bet she is dragging this 
out on purpose."

"Well, Ms. Washu did say she needed her calculations to be correct if you 
didn't want to turn into an old hag.  That's worth waiting for in my book."

"No kidding," Ryoko said flipping a sheet up onto the line, this time 
levitating to a more useful height.

Ayeka just shook her head.  "I think it's time for your lesson with Tenchi.  
You'd better hurry if you don't want to be late."

"Ugh! Don't get all big sisterly on me," Ryoko muttered, but followed 
Ayeka's advice and dashed inside to take her place at the dinner table.

Tenchi was already there, sitting in seiza and waiting for her. She slid in 
next to him and looked at the open book he was holding.

"Hi Ryoko.  Let's get started.  Try this one." He pointed to a word.

She leaned forward and looked at it.  Her tongue stuck out from her lips as 
she pondered.

"Go on," he encouraged.

"Kah," she sounded out, emphasizing the hard k sound.

"AAAA...Tah."

"Kh aaa Tah... Cat!"

"Very good!" Tenchi applauded.  "That was great.  Let's see if you can do 
the next one.  I bet you can!"

Ryoko crossed her arms.  "I may look like I am nine years old, but please try 
to refrain from speaking to me that way!" she snarled with a scowl.

Tenchi slipped an arm around her shoulders and gave her a squeeze. "Oh I 
don't mean it that way Ryoko!   I'm just excited for you."

Ryoko blushed at the open show of affection, but decided to keep her mouth 
shut. 

Washu watched silently from around the corner.  She had come to tell 
Ryoko that she had figured out how to fix both her reading and her physical 
age in one fell swoop.  But given how much Ryoko seemed enjoying herself, 
it could wait a couple of days.

"Mom?" Ryoko called, sensing her presence.

Washu reached into her pocket and pulled out a small camera.  She darted 
around the corner and took a quick photo of Tenchi with his arm around 
Ryoko.  "That's one for the scrap book!" she crowed gleefully.

"Gah!  MO-OM!" Ryoko screeched, squirming away from Tenchi as if she 
were burned.

Washu grinned.  Yes, there was no rush. No rush at all.

The END!


**I hoped you liked my first Tenchi fanfic!  And to those readers of my Daria 
fanfic, I hope this made sense to you.  The Tenchi world(s) are very unique 
and complex.  I know I said I retired from writing fanfics to pursue a novel, 
but I started watching all the incarnations of Tenchi and this story begged to 
be written.  I didn't mean to lie!  So while I think my Daria fic days are over, 
I have a couple of Tenchi fics to write as of yet.

I'd like to thank John Takis for his help and feed back on the first draft of 
this story.  His thoughts about the characterizations were very helpful.  And 
Also, many thanks go out to Diana Morgan for her lovely art work at the top 
of this fic.  Isn't that picture of little Ryoko just the cutest?

If you enjoyed this fic, please take a moment to drop me a line (shire@one.net) and let me 
know what parts you liked, and what parts didn't work for you.  This will 
help me make the next one even better!

If you want to draw me an illustration, I will be happy to imbed it in the 
HTML version of this story and give you full credits.  I love illustrations in 
my stories, but alas!  I can't draw!**