Between Light and Shadow,
Name and Deed:

        It is a time of darkness, a time of chaos, where two forces are
locked in a timeless battle of wits and power.  The prize: Total
Control over the Universe.
        On one side of the battlefield lies the Goddess Tokimi, a mysterious
otherworldly entity who has manipulated the destiny of billions for
centuries.  She has chosen to side her considerable power with the
Jurai Empire, a feudal government whose very power-base is unknown
even to their leaders.
        On the other side of the conflict, is the enigmatic Shadow Player, a
creature of chaos and order, darkness and goodness, unfathomable to
the universe, and whose power has shifted the fates of entire
galaxies.  His power is secretly backing the Galactic Assembly and
their so-called peaceful, open-handed power structure.
        Held between these two forces, on a lone and distant planet called
Earth, is a handful of people.  Each person holds within himself or
herself an untapped potential, be it physical, mental, or purely
spiritual.  These potentials are under the constant manipulations of
the two players, forever being tossed into situations they do not
understand.  All while trying to live a pseudo-normal life in a place
called the Masaki Shrine.

Book 10: Loss of Livelihood
By
Ryan Norman

Act I:
Where Does the Hunter go When There is Nowhere Left to Hunt?

Prologue:  Where Do I Go From Here?

        My name is Deevra Murishawa.  To some, I am a leader.  To others, I
am a rogue.  To a crew of two hundred, I am hope and strength.  To a
band of eleven people, I am a flawed enemy.  To an entire race, I am a
last chance.  To another, I am a shame.  To my best friend, I am a
confidant.  To another, I am a liar.  To a beautiful woman, I am a
true love.  To another, I am a hated opponent.  To my worst enemies, I
am a great warrior.  To my closest allies, I am worthless.  I am none
of these things.  I am a man, and nothing else.
Throughout my life, I have been marked, chosen, and labeled.  I have
never truly fit in anywhere.  In the Galactic Assembly, my rank makes
me a Commander, yet to the same people, my worth makes me a rebel.  To
an entire starship, my position makes me a leader, and yet I am
watched closely in silence, for my record makes me an outcast.  My own
people, the Illnians, call me a savior, claiming I was foretold of in
ancient legends.  Yet they shun me, for I am only half-Illnian.  The
other half of my blood comes from the Jurai.  They call me a mistake,
a chance occurrence which they wish they could erase.  To either side,
I am a monster, whether defender or destroyer.  Again, I am none of
these things.  But that is what I am called.
I regret much that I have done.  At the same time I regret little.  I
would be nothing if what happened did not happen.  My life has made me
good and dear friends.  My livelihood has made me viscous enemies.  My
command decisions have won me great battles.  My personal choices have
lost me my closest friends.  The greatest triumphs in my life have
ruined my life.  My greatest failure has led me to my truest love.
All of these events have led up to what I am today.  The worst of it,
though, is that I'm not sure what that is anymore.
It's been almost two years since I first met Ryoko.  That fateful
meeting that turned my life upside-down.  Before then, I was brash,
arrogant, strong-willed and eager.  I knew just what I was doing.  But
it was only a charade, only a lie covering up the truth.  Inside, I
was alone and helpless.  But I had convinced myself that it didn't
matter.  As long as I was at a good rank in the hierarchy, just high
enough to not be some military grunt, but not so high that they'd
strap me to an office desk and make me do paperwork all day long, I
was pseudo happy.  Hell, I knew I pissed off my higher-ups, but I
always got the job done, and got it done well.
But it all changed with Ryoko.  When I first learned of my assignment,
I thought I could finally get revenge on the one who destroyed my
people's home.  By the end of the job, I did get revenge, but not on
Ryoko.  Kagato was the real culprit, and I got the chance to put him
and my conscience to rest.  But something's wrong.  I'm still empty
inside…
Now that I no longer hear my people's voices in my head, calling for
vengeance, I'm alone again.  Which is strange, since I now have
someone sharing my bed at night.  Someone who loves me and who I love
just as much.  Ursil…
But it's just not enough.  I have to know!  I have to figure out…
Where I go from here…